Personal Narrative Analysis

Being different is lonely, no one likes to admit this, but it’s true. You can be in a group of ten of your really good friends, but feel completely alone. I’m an only child because my mother has chronic anxiety and was proclaimed mentally unfit to have any more children by her doctor because of this I have no siblings and no one to communicate with at home, due to the lack of communication with peers my age I eventually developed social anxiety and became a loner that had no friends. The first time I truly understood how this made me different was when I transferred to a new high school. While walking from the train station to my new school my parent’s words popped into my thoughts, “A new beginning, a new chance to make a new name for myself”, this was what my parents had been nagging me about for the past week, but to me it just seemed like tedious work, making new friends and social anxiety didn’t go well with each other.

In my own life, I've also had instances where I felt alone because I didn't conform to what everyone else was doing. It was frustrating when friends made plans without including me simply because we chose different

When I was in high school, I held the upmost conviction that I, alone, was completely different from everyone else. I knew deep down that I couldn’t place

No matter where one goes on this dismal chunk of rock, one will probably encounter an outsider. In high school lunchrooms there is always at least one poor, sad teenager who has the unlucky seat next to the trash can. In parks and school playgrounds there is always that one melancholy kid that provides a stark contrast from the joyful shouts and screams coming from the other playing children. The experience of being an outsider is an inescapable universal condition that can be caused through social class, appearance, or other factors.

When I was thinking about what I wanted to write about my experience as an outsider, all that came to my head is my experience so far in college. Every adult in my life told me before I came to Fitchburg that “oh everyone will like you” or “these are the friends you have for the rest of your life”. I came into college with high hopes and

I always knew I was different or didn’t fit in as well as my other classmates. I mean, sure I talked, dressed and pretty much looked like everyone else, but my ethnic background made me think I couldn’t succeed in life because I was born in a foreign country. Whenever people would talk about immigration at school, I would became very uncomfortable and sit silently. It felt like all eyes were on me, but when I would look around no one was actually staring. They were concentrated on their work or staring off into space.

Ever since third grade, I was different from the other kids in the classroom. The other kids always teased me and called me names like, “Nerd!”, and “Smarty-pants” because I was the youngest one in the grade. This torment continued to haunt me through all the schools that I went to. In school, I was anti-social because of my gap that separated me from my peers. This seemed like a barrier that I couldn’t face, and I wouldn’t have been able to do it if I wasn’t determined, or if I had great friends that helped me along the way.

Ever since I can remember, I have always been the odd one out; or at least it always felt like I was in my own distinct universe. All the way until my Freshman year of High School, very little, with the exception of school, had my even remote interest. While other children my age would pass the day playing sports, or having a social life, I would shy away from all forms of interaction. However, it is not that I did not want attention, it was just that I did not see the point in focusing on something other than the important things in life. It would be years later in my first year of high school that I learned the importance of all aspects of life, from academics to social interactions. Regardless of how long it took for me to figure out my place in this world, my quest to reveal my true identity has only just

Before the age of three I had an array of tests performed on me that most people do not have in a lifetime, including ultrasounds, MRIs, CAT scans, and endoscopies. However, none of the tests told the doctors what was wrong. They could not figure out what was causing me, starting at only one years old, to throw up starting at 3 A.M. and ending at 12 P.M., at least two nights a week. This went on for years. My parents and I became accustomed to these recurring “episodes” because medications only worked for so long, eventually my body would become used to them and the doctors would have to figure out what to prescribe me next. By the age of ten, I had outgrown my mysterious illness, but, I am still working to outgrow all of the struggles it

Lunch came soon than I wanted it to be. Everyone had their own seats, leaving none for me. I went outside and found one empty table. I sat down at the small table and stared down at my tuna. My stupid tuna. The blue nail polish came on to the table for me to see Summer and her posse. "Well look who it is. The girl who wants to flirt with my boyfriend." Summer hissed at me, clearly piss off. I sat still in my chair, not knowing what to do. I didn't want something to come out of my mouth that would further ruin my terrible day. "You think being the new girl around here gives you the right to make eyes for Tyler." Conveniently, Tyler came from behind Summer and gave her a kiss on her right cheek. He saw his girlfriend was mad. I mean, everyone could see

The death penalty should be illegal in the United States due to its complete lack of moral decency, financial benefit, and an increased number of systematic flaws. Using the death penalty shows human’s darkest side morally because they are consciously choosing to kill. Even while ignoring the moral implications of the death penalty, it is often not economically advantageous either. In addition, the system of capital punishment possesses mistakes caused by human error and lack of consideration for the class system. Ultimately, the death penalty causes more harm than benefits and is a flaw in our society.

Your existence, which includes never having experienced the negative effects of transformation is more than ideal. Conversely, despite the sector, previous colleagues and I have resorted to fear and anxiety as it relates to impending job loss. None the less, any anxiety or depression was misplaced. Moreover, in most instances each transformation exhibited successful outcomes, and later proved to be assets to the prospective organizations, and to the members forced to utilize any new procedures.

This feeling of being unwanted along with the feeling of insecurity, caused by the financial struggles my family, as the first generation, had while trying to start a life in a completely different country, pressured my true personality. I began to talk less, thinking that it would help take some burden off my parent's shoulders. These feelings completely endowed my childhood. It was to a point that I had already forgotten how to socialize with people and became extremely introverted that I started to acknowledge what I was enduring.

I knew I was different, even at school, I would always get in trouble for the most stupid reasons. Whenever we learned about the small amount of history that we were allowed to be informed about, I would never fully understand why something happened. So like any student, I would raise my hand, ask my question, and hopefully get an answer. Although, it was apparently different with me because once my question left my mouth, I was yelled at over and over again. And each response from the professor would basically be “Because it did now shut up”. And of course this only worsened once my dad died and had a mental breakdown and started to interrogate everything. Even among my peers, I was more... what’s the word I want to use... socially out there?

It was an aching solitude. I sat in silence, ensnared within my chaotic mind while everyone’s elated voices stretched across the classroom like a contagious disease but my immunity was too study to catch a speck of it. I was never a big fan of change, especially ones that strike you without any warning. The transition from elementary to junior high wasn’t the challenging part for me, it was the fact that I felt alone. It never occurred to me that everything was temporary, even friendships.