Inevitably, everyone, at one point or the other, has a friend or family member who succumbs to sickness. Unfortunately, this can cause grief, depression, stress, and even anxiety. Sadly, I am learning that it’s not easy to embrace the unknown. Eventually, we all have to come together in our lives to make crucial decisions regarding loss. We ask ourselves: how is this going to be solved?
Since 2011, my grandfather has fallen very ill. It's caused great concern in my life and in my immediate family. It's as if a ton of boulders have fallen onto me personally, yet it's hurting us all. His health has slowly deteriorated, but there’s not much my family can do. My grandmother is taking care of him, making sure he has all he needs, but we are worried about her health as well. The nature of his illness is difficult to understand and leaves me/us feeling powerless. My parents are helping me to deal with and to prepare for whatever is coming, but it is still extremely hard to confront.
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I don't think there's an easy answer, but I have been searching for one. In our family, it's been a tough spot; there are not many options for us. Like Elisabeth Kubler-Ross said-we cannot stop grief, but there are tools that can help identify our emotions. In a situation such as this, it’s best to take a look at yourself: how are you handling the situation? As a friend or a family member’s sickness gets worse, you have to take charge of your own health in order to help yourself and others get through the grieving process. This is something I am slowly learning to do. The melancholy news can push you into a never ending black hole. Every day I try to fight against going into this black hole. Whenever the phone rings, I worry there might be bad news about
Research Report: Review of the Literature on Anticipated vs. Unanticipated Death and their Corresponding Coping Skills
“Disenfranchised Grief. People experience disenfranchised grief, also know as marginal or unsupported grief, when their relationship to the deceased person is not socially sanctioned, cannot be openly shared or seems of lesser significance. The person’s loss and grief do not meet the norms of grief acknowledged
Before I get into this I just want to clarify that the title isn't a reflection of how I view grief; the question has been presented to me using these words by clients more times than I can remember.
Black Americans can have different emotions from crying to being silent. People usually gather in large gatherings to pay respect. Black Americans have a belief that death is God’s will and the deceased is in God’s hand and will be reunited
I picked the article, “Grief Without Belief: How Do Atheists Deal With Death?” because, growing up in a Catholic household, I too was curious about how atheists cope with death. I liked and agreed with what Ali Rizvi said about finding comfort in facts. It is a lot easier to feel safe when you know undoubtedly that something is true. For all we know, the stories that got passed down could have gotten distorted as year went by. I, however, did not like what was said about having a physicist speaking at your funeral. Saying things like people who are dead live on because of the conservation of energy and the first law of thermodynamics is very impersonal. If my child is to die before me, I would not want some man coming at me with scientific
The effects of grief are abundant and in many categories. They mostly influence people in three ways – physically, psychologically, and spiritually. It affects them greatly and it is hard to hide it. Some people try to deal with it on their own, some talk to a psychologist, and some simply turn to their loved ones. They all deal with it in different ways, but it is agreed that it shows. They may show a variety of different reactions like denial, anger, depression, or even acceptance. Getting over loss takes time. For some, it may take years. For some, maybe just a couple months. The
On the other hand, Kübler-Ross and her stage theory have helped countless people through the grieving process. All the stages identify the emotions and decisions that people make when they are grieving. They simply fall short of details. There needs to be more than what she states. The individual person must be taken in to account. Yes, the stages occur but are they really stages or more of a guideline of what you might experience over a time of grieving that is specific to each person.
As a child, I did not have many friends, I was bullied throughout my entire childhood which caused me to shut most of the world out. I began to seclude myself from everything and everyone, except my grandfather. My grandfather quickly became my security blanket, my shoulder to cry on, and my best friend. He spent most of his time comforting me and telling me that I was too precious for this world. After a while, I began to believe those words and my confidence grew immensely. However, at the raw age of thirteen, my grandfather was diagnosed with stage three brain cancer and was given only a year to live. At that point, everything started to decay for me. I did not care about anything anymore, whether that was school, my family, or myself.
I think this information can help out some of the staff members who have a problem with addressing their own family member about grieving. For example, after I read the information it helped me to deal with my sister’s death although August 2015 would 5 years. I can now help my family members, so we can all more forward together.
The summer of 2005 was supposed to be great, I had survived my freshman year of college, and things were starting to get better until the phone rang at 2 AM on June 20th. All I could hear was my mom weeping. It was my uncle from India; he had phoned to let my mom know that her sister had been diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer. My mom and I left for India the next day to be with her. For nearly nine months, my aunt complained of unremitting dull lower abdominal pain, lack of appetite, and unexplained weight gain. She was under the care of physicians at her local clinic regarding her health concerns; however, her case was not investigated thoroughly on time. My aunt and I were really close and seeing her spirit and body so broken down
Being diagnosed with a poor prognosis can cause a various experience and a range of emotions. However, people have to manage these feelings to live a fulfilling life. There are many emotional and cognitive responses which an individual may face after knowing about the diagnosed disease and its prognosis. It is a very difficult situation for the individual and the family. In addition, the individual’s mentally gets changed after knowing his condition. The individual must try to overcome those feelings and remain strong to fight with the diagnosed disease.
I’m sitting in the passenger seat, parked in front of my home, staring straight out the front window at my house and feeling an antagonizing need to be inside of it in my room curled up in my bed. My mom is speaking next to me, but, I haven’t heard anything since, she said, “I have cancer and so does your grandpa,” meaning two out of the four people I hold dearest could be leaving me, permanently. Later on I piece together the details my mom was telling me in the car, she has ovarian cancer and will have to have a full hysterectomy, assuming it has not spread, and grandpa has stage 4 pancreatic cancer; no hope of treatment or surgery for him. At sixteen years old I stop relying on my mother and older brother for anything, I take to being the
The sickness is taking me. Some days I can’t think. I know I’m here physically, but mentally I’m not. I’m scared of dying, all my family has left. People that are sick like me, that I’ve talked to, died.
When this happens our minds will reel, searching for some type of coping method to a problem you may not have encountered before. In situations like this our subconscious leans toward the irrational, with ideas like, "Well we have to do something new and extreme, since because the normal methods worked I wouldn't be stressed anymore." We need to be watchful of this, as it can lead us to self-destructive habits such as substance abuse, or worse lead to suicidal thoughts. The "Summer Solstice" gave a good example of what a person is willing to do when they aren't in their right mind when it said," he went up the iron stairs through the roof of the building and over the soft, tarry surface to the edge, put one leg over the complex green tin cornice and said if they came a step closer that was it." (2-5) This is a prime example of an altered mindset that could eventually lead to thoughts of suicide. Part of dealing with such grief is understanding how we process it. The other part is building up our endurance to the pain our stress brings us. While it may seem unbearable, and it may never completely heal, you can learn new methods to cope with
My grandfather passed away in 2008 from lung cancer, he quit smoking 10 years prior to his death. Aside from cancer the only other thing my grandfather was diagnose wit was hypertension. My grandmother health is unknown and is now deceased. My mother is as healthy as can be and hasn’t been diagnosed with anything to our knowledge. Her aunts and uncles from her father’s side of the family are diagnosed with diabetes, hypertension, asthma and etc. My sisters and I are also healthy, the only thing I have are allergies and that’s only when I am exposed to an extremely filthy