Family Recovery Narrative

Many participants engaged the group with stories of overcoming addiction or being sexually molested by family members as reasons behind their addiction. However all of their stories were compelling and empowering to the group of individuals who have seemed to endure some of the same sentiments as their fellow group mate. It appeared as if the individuals in the group even though that were court ordered appeared to be extremely engaged and very involved during the meetings. It seemed as though most who attended found peace and solice from the group during the NA meetings. As it stated by Krentzman, Robinson, Moore, et.al (2010), client’s state that their top two reasons for attending NA meetings were to promote recovery/ sobriety and to find support acceptance and friendships. One thing that I learned from the NA group that just as in AA, family support deems to be an important function on the perseverance of an addict and that the participation and involvement of family is detrimental in the treatment process for the addicts. In several of our readings many of the passages discussed the effects of family systems support as it pertains to substance abusers chemical addiction. The passages described the family system as being a detrimental part of the treatment process as well as for the treatment of the family as well. According to past studies, family involvement has aided clients in

Drug and chemical abuse affect many families and that particular family that lives through a loved one who is an addict and the priority is to get help for the individual. In any intervention that involves drug addicts, a family's disposition is very important. Full recovery of any drug addict involves the restoration of the person's life as well as ensuring that those who are around the addict have the best ability when it comes to helping with abstinence which is a long-term goal. Abusers are often in denial or even believe that they are totally in control of their use of drugs

Programs that aid in the recovery of family members of addicts are also very different from those that help with domestic violence. The 12-step program worked by family members in Al-Anon is almost identical to those worked by alcoholics in AA, including acknowledging the fact that they are “powerless over alcohol,” placing a reliance on a higher power to “restore [them] to sanity,” (Al-Anon, 2008; p.44). This approach can make a person who has been abused feel even less in control of their life. This idea also serves to further reinforce the excuse of substance use that might be made by their abuser.

I really enjoyed this chapter and there are some dynamics that I know all too well. The family model and the complexities are something I haven’t know until more recent, at least a certain dynamic of it. I families want and expect me to be a certain way. I think about my wife and how she would try to exclude me and how she seemed happier when I was on drugs. She grew up in a family of six where the father, for the most part was absent. Lee had left for four years of Kyia’s life for reasons I never pursued and probably aren’t known, meaning that rarely does a person commit to such a change without have multiple motivators. For the most part I wasn’t a drug user throughout our marriage, my faith was extremely important to me, and still is.

Although all sorts of families can be devastated by addiction, but single parent units (the most common lower class structure) are the most obscured. Behavioral Health of the Palm Beaches supports, “In every family unit, each person plays a role (or multiple roles) to help the family function better and to maintain a level of homeostasis, stability and balance. When substance abuse is added to this dynamic, the family roles naturally shift to adjust to the new behaviors associated with drug or alcohol use, and to continue maintaining order and balance.”4 In single parent units there is an inability of a second parent to fill the void role of the addicted parent. The National Center for Biotechnology Information states, “Frequently, children may act as surrogate spouses for the parent who abuses substances. For example, [young] children may develop elaborate systems of denial to protect themselves against that reality of the parent’s addiction. Because that option does not exist in a single‐parent household with a parent who abuses substances, children are likely to behave in a manner that is not age‐appropriate to compensate for the parental deficiency.”2 So a child growing up in a compromised family unit where addiction is present may develop altered norms and mature into an addict themselves.4

As we entered the dim living room we immediately noticed my uncle. He sat there on the ugly floral sofa looking lifeless. Today was his twenty-fourth birthday and we had come over to celebrate. My mother and I brought over cupcakes and streamers. Today was supposed to be a celebration of his life but he was so much closer to death. My mom could tell how alone and scared he was without him even speaking. I looked up at her and could see all the anger in her eyes. She wasn’t mad at her only brother, instead she was mad at heroin. That’s what brought him to this state after all. My uncle is not the only person that’s been brought to this state. Its an epidemic and the only way to win the battle against drugs and addiction is to support the government in finding a solution.

Typically, it is not the person who is abusing drugs and/or alcohol seeking help, rather a concerned relative (Abraham & Roman, 2011). Research has also reflected that many people struggling with substance abuse maintain close contact with their families (Abraham & Roman, 2011). Thus, families serve not only as a natural base for helping the person with chemical dependence enter treatment but also play a role in pushing him or her to engage in

Substance abuse, the abuse of drugs or alcohol, is known to have a lasting impact on members of the abuser’s family (Crosson-Tower, 2013). Ultimately there are two ways in which a family can experience the detrimental effects of substance abuse within the family system itself, and those ways are through either substance abuse on the parent’s behalf or substance abuse by the adolescents or children in the family unit (Crosson-Tower, 2013). Substance abuse can have many negative impacts on a family unit; the negative impacts are known to be emotionally, physically, and mentally damaging (Gruber & Taylor, 2006).

Inside my family structure, my mother’s parents struggled with addiction. My grandmother, Ellen Sweeney, who has since deceased, was addicted to opiates, and my grandfather, Wayne Smith, who has also passed away, was an alcoholic. My mom was one of five children, her siblings included, Margaret “Markie”, the eldest, , Catherine “Kerrie”, the second eldest, my mother, Marian, the middle child, Amy, the second youngest, and lastly, Matt, the youngest. Moreover, my mother and my aunt Margaret “Markie” Smith have also battled alcoholism and my aunt Amy has since been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. Due to my mother’s family struggle with alcoholism, addiction, and mental disorder, my mother’s childhood was particularly difficult. Not only was she undoubtedly influenced by her parent’s substance abuse when she was a child, but it has continues to affect her as an adult raising her own children.

“We were driving up the mountain and a boulder came rolling down and flipped over our car”

When you begin grow in your recovery, value yourself more and look forward to the next climb, you begin to realize that you have a voice and the power to change things for the better. In my hometown Windsor, I have made needed changes to C.O.A.S.T (Community Outreach and Suipport Team). This is a partnership between Windsor Police Service and the Community Crisis Centre of Hotel-Dieu Grace Healthcare. A team consisting of a plain clothes police officers and crisis workers provide on-site crisis and mental health assessments to people age 16 and over. These individuals are marginalized and vulnerable with complex mental health and psychosocial problems such as untreated mental illness; housing and financial issues; substance abuse; physical

In this website “ True Story of Addiction”, written Tuesday October 2nd, 2012 exclaims the harsh things that can happen from seeing a family member or friend hurt herself from an addiction and how they caop, so when you get older that’s all you know how to do. This website gives amazing stories of how families and friends go through these struggles to get out of their loved one out of this addiction. Savannah is the one that wrote about herself and told us about her addiction and her struggle and she said, “Both of my parents are active addicts, so it was my mom who got me into it. She’s always acted like a teenager, more like a friend than a mom, and she gave me pills for the first time. I was living with her back then and I started using

Ellie and I lay in our beds, neither one of us knew what to say. In the other room, our host parents were arguing. We didn’t know what about, but we knew it was serious. Then we heard a “THWACK” followed by silence. Ellie and I sat up in our beds and looked at each other, I could tell she was as scared as I was. “Was that? Did he just?” she asked me. Then the arguing started back up again. We calmed back down until we heard it again. “THWACK” We knew then, the noise we heard, was him beating her. We got up, our hearts racing; neither of us knew what to do. We got our nerves together to go get help. When we opened the door to our room we saw the children sitting on the couch crying out for their mother. I could see the fear in their face and I knew something needed to change.

“How could you? How could you do this to me?” I sputtered. Nothing made sense anymore, I was too light headed to understand. “I can’t breathe,” I gasped. I choked on the little air I had left. With the remaining strength I had, I sprinted up the stairs and slammed the door behind me. The last thing I remembered was falling to the ground as the tears fell with

The narrow mountain road leading down to the hospital was a sheet of ice. I was going to the mental hospital to visit my nine year old son, Andy. Although Andy was just a child, he had a very disturbed mind. He had murdered both my husband and his older sister, yet I couldn’t see him as the monster that everyone else perceived him as. Neither my husband or my daughter were ever very nice to Andy. They called him names and told him he was a worthless, freak. I loved my husband and my daughter, but they were bullies in my eyes. They treated Andy like such an animal and would constantly tell me that I shouldn’t trust my sweet boy. “There’s something not right about him, Mom” my daughter, Mandy, would complain. Granted Andy growing up was always a strange kid, but I never did think that my sweet little boy was that demented in the head that he would actually resort to murder.