Accepting My Identity

Currently, I am in the process of not only becoming comfortable in my identity, a black queer woman, but, also attempting to find solace in my identity as well. Something that all women, especially black queer women, should achieve in their lifetime. It is that dream that inspires me to travel to experience other cultures and to unite with women from various cultures across the black diaspora. Throughout many cultures, women’s identities are defined by their male counterparts and the labor they provide to them. Therefore, a major goal of mine is to create a space where women are able to exist outside the scope of their relationships with men and live uninhibitedly to become their best selves. That is why I find it pertinent to travel not only

I was terribly nervous because I did not know one single person at JM. I thought I was going to sit alone at lunch and I never would make any friends. I also thought that I would be lost on the first day and go to all the wrong classes! Surprisingly, I made a friend at freshmen orientation. Her name was Monita. Unfortunately, Monita and I had no classes together except for lunch. At least I had someone to sit with at lunch and one of my fears were gone. On my first day, I went to all my classes without any confusion. I was not lost and I made a few friends. Eventually, I began to make more friends and adjust to my new high school. I even went to the football

I always had a clear sense of where I belonged and as a result I always made sure I never fell out of place. As I reached adolescence I became more self-conscious. The relationship with my hijab changed. I went from embracing it with pride and acceptance to me being resentful and confused.

Every year I look back on the previous and I see how much I have changed. I see the friends I have gained and lost. The heartbreak and the happiness. Despite how rough times have gotten, it has truly made me stronger. Everything has shaped who I am today, it has shaped my identity. Identity is a complex topic because it consists of changeable and unchangeable traits and outside internal influences; my own identity has been shaped by going from private to public school, young life camp, and my current friends.

My social identity plays a huge part in shaping and defining my role as a leader. The way I view myself combined with the way that others view me frames the narrative of my opportunities to be a leader in many ways. Of my various social identity characteristics, the two that play the largest part in my life are my gender and appearance as a woman and my economic standing as lower middle class.

Unlocking the doors of the past, gives way to a deeper reflection of one's inner self. We begin our journey to find my identity and to perhaps find a better understanding of how I came to be. A heritage originating from the Caucasus Mountains to my new found origin, beginning in New Jersey. My parents migrated to NJ and brought much of their tradition and culture, which to them was a foreign land. Hard-working individuals who were always concerned about their children's well-being and happiness. The strict traditional make-up of our family home consisted of a mother and father routinely working on set hours. My mother mostly did the cooking and household chores while my father did repairs, took out the garbage and keep up with the landscaping. Once school started, English became the first language spoken in the house. Aside from the English language, a second and third language was developed through indirect exposure which is an added plus, yet in a sense decreases the writing skills, due to the lack of vocabulary words which are the creative elements which forms an eloquent style of delivery. I recall memories of the times they would sit down at the kitchen table discussing the finances of the family making sure there was money saved, for a rainy day. They were definitely law abiding citizens that took pride in their home as well as the

The incorporation of the veil in Muslim society dates back to the 19th century, but has originally started in the middle east (“What is the Hijab and Why do Women Wear it?”). As a matter of fact, as religion and culture spread, so did the veil, eventually making its way to Southeast Asia. The veil started as a way of protection for women, to protect their modesty and virtue. Surprisingly, this belief goes back to the Prophet Muhammad, the founder of Islam, which said that women should be modest. Additionally, this was a universal message, that women should follow these standards (“Muhammad and Women.”).

I am truly proud of my background and how it has formed my identity. My background consists of me being Portuguese. I could not be any more thankful for how greatly my background has impacted my life into what it is now. It has helped me gain many friends that I am still very close to and gain interests that have started since I was a child. Simply experiencing my family’s numerous customs and traditions is why I love to express that I am Portuguese. It has given me the opportunity to visit Portugal every year during each summer where I fall in love with the country each time. Being Portuguese has taught me many lessons throughout life that I will continue to pass on for future generations of my family.

Everybody has an identity, it makes them individual and unique, and it defines who you are as a person. This project about my identity showed me what makes me unique. I would have never known how much my friends mean to me or how my identities connect with each other. I have three identities that make me who I am, cultural, personal, and social. A specific quality that covers my cultural identity is being Czechoslovakian. Both sides of my family have at least a part of Czech in them. My great-grandparents are from Czech Republic and my grandpa was the first generation in America, he was born in Ohio. This is very important because I have always identified as Czech and it is a big part of me, as I am so interested in ancestry. For my personal identity, the biggest part is my personality, being loud and outgoing, has always been important to me. The reason being, it is how people view me. A lot of people know me as the loud person or the person who talks a lot. That is meaningful to me considering I like people to view me in a certain way The last identity, social, is one of the most important to me because it involves my friends, and through this project, I learned how vital they really are to my social identity. I realized that I have a good amount of friends in this project. It is nice to have people as a support system and to relate with. These qualities show that I value being loud and outgoing. It also says that I value my family and they are a big part of life. The last one, social, ties in with the first one because it shows I am outgoing and friendly.

It was my junior year of high school when I realized I shouldn’t care about people. My personal happiness became more important. That was kind of difficult for the people around me. One reason was that during the previous year, all my friends had seen me without my hijab on, so it was a bit hard for them to grasp my new look. The year before I started wearing my hijab, I was a little rebellious and rather outgoing, so wearing the hijab the following year turned me around 180

My identity crisis started when I was about 9 years old. The realization that I was different from friends, family, and my classmates were scary and hard to bare. As a young child, we are taught and framed to be a certain way, think a certain way, and live a certain way according to the family structure. Like most young girls I often fantasized about my wedding. What type of dress I was going to wear, what colors I would pick and what type of dress my wife would choose. My fantasies were often disrupted by the sound of my mother’s voice instructing me to complete a task, or letting me know she was home. At that very moment internal shame, and denial would set in. This is not normal, a wife, why was I thinking about a wife? I don’t like girls! I like Josh. That’s who I will marry, Josh.

Freshman year I remember walking into the school mortified, thinking that everything and anything that could go wrong would. I had never attended a Liberty-Benton School and knew about five people that would be in my grade. I was shy and quiet because I didn’t know any of the new faces. I was insecure about myself and thought that it would be almost impossible to make friends. Before high school, I went to a small, private,

I believe everyone can agree that going back to school isn’t the best thing but everyone gets excited when they see their friends on the first day of school. Why is that many people ask? That is because a community of friends have the power and capability to make a person’s day better and happier, and everyone I know likes to usually be happy. On the first day of school usually the time before first period or lunch, students walk around looking to see and find their friends because that is where they feel most secure and safe but mostly happy. If you were to think of the most comfortable place that you would like to be at school I’m positive it is probably at a class full of friends or at the cafeteria where friends meet up. Friends have the power to make a person’s day change moods either from sad to happy, anxious to relaxed or even tired to energized. Yes I do agree there are times that people would like to be alone but in school I find it hard to believe that someone would rather be alone than with their friends. Picture in your head, on the first day of school you enter your first period and let say you are a sophomore. When you enter your first period class it is full of juniors and seniors that you have never talked to in your life. But even if you end up in a class with

The first day of a student’s high schools can be be a terrifying and stressful situation and this way definitely true for me. Leaving middle school I didn’t have very many friends even though I was in band and talked to kids while I spent my time there. But my first high school activity wasn’t the first day of school. It was band camp and I was actually more stressed out for band camp since most of our marching show is learned during that time. It turns out though, that band camp would be where I made some of my greatest friends.

Starting high school is something everyone seems to be excited for. I had a different experience in 9th grade then most people I know. In 8th grade I did Online school and I decided that I wanted to go to my local high school for 9th grade. While I was doing online school in 8th grade I had lost all my friends so in 9th I was starting fresh and had a plan to somehow make friends. I started out the first day of school with the mindset that I was going to be a complete loner because everyone already had their set friend groups. At first, I was a loner but that ended up changing.