Reflection Paper

Abraham Maslow was a physiologist that believed that “people cannot appreciate or strive for ‘the finer things’ until they have ‘the basics’ taken care of” (Rasskazova, E., Ivanova, T., & Sheldon, K., 2016, p. 541). People must have food, water, and shelter before they can have friendship, self-esteem, and morality. Not only do people need to address the basics first, but organizations also need to address the basics first before they can successfully go any further.

Bang! The gun goes off and your life flashes before your eyes. It’s the moment I realize I need to focus in on my body’s effort and concentration to finish the course that lies before me. I’m thinking about the race most of the day and preparing mentally for what challenges can occur along the course. Could I fall and sprain or break an ankle? Could I get overheated and sick? I’ve ask myself these questions while running Cross Country for six years. But, nothing can really prepare me for what’s ahead when I’m running. When that gun goes off and everyone starts running, it’s a totally different environment. My dedication and pride got me through coming in last for four years of cross country. I learned this exact lesson as journeyed my way to each finish line, making me stronger each time.

Throughout each life stage I have encountered weather it being the past future or present I have faced and will face changes. The changes are influenced by the developmental stage, developmental tasks, psychosocial crisis, and central process for resolving crisis, radius of significant relationships, and the coping strategies I have adapted to. Within these aspects previously listed that have influenced me in the past, present, and in the future I have successes and barriers that have also shaped me into the person I am in my present stage. By way of example, the psychosexual theory and the social learning theory draw relation to my development and experiences that have shaped my development through my life stages. Upon the early adolescence, later adolescence, and early adulthood life stages I have encountered have helped structure the development I have in my present life stage.

When I was 16 years old I realized I had written a paper about how me and my Nana are different and had forgotten the first paragraph. I do not know how I managed to do that but I need to introduce the ways in which we are different. I like to eat, food is good which means you should a lot of it and often but my Nana is is a big health junkie, she was visiting us and every time we had a meal we would hear why we should not be eating what we are eating and why we should be eating something else. Secondly, stars are in the sky everyone knows that, but how the stars are aligned should not decide how you live your life most people know that, not my Nana she would ask when I was born and then log on to her computer and tell me to watch out because how she believes in ideas that are more out there then what I believe in. Ideas such as, yelling at ice will make it freeze weird or that the Earth is a computer simulation. And now that this part is done I can turn the paper in.

Throughout this semester teaching the theories that resonated with me the most were: Cross and Fhagen-Smith’s Model of “Black Identity Development”, and Yasso’s “Community Cultural Wealth Model.” As a minority these two identities have shaped my life profoundly. My personal theory philosophy comes from my lived experience and my time working as graduate assistant in the Multicultural Center.

She compared her life to a hurricane, a natural disaster that took everything in its path and destroy any shred of light in her life. Thus, the weeks turned into years of regressive behavior that led her to believe that she was not good enough to truly be herself. She only allowed herself to be her mother’s puppet, an item only used for public occasions, for if she ever became her own self, she would be outcasted. Yet, during those times I recall a shout in the cave of darkness, a murmured voice saying: Carpe Diem. Seize the day. My brother used those words when I was little —he was an extroverted fellow who vocalized whatever he felt because he was confident in whom he was. Nevertheless, I was an introverted, insecure, and self-conscious kid who was silenced by the public because they scared me. Fear ruled my actions. Fear ruled my mind. Fear ruled me; yet, my brother’s words rang a certain alarm in my head when I grew up. Thus, I realized that my individuality was stolen. My silence was bought, and my uniqueness was used as a weapon for society’s cruel expectations. I noticed that the world has so many beliefs, ideas, and aspirations that I wanted my own drum to beat in my own rhythm.

Over the course of the past few months I have learned that writing for college differs from writing an assignment for high school. During this semester I have had the chance to be challenged as well as grow as a writer. I have written various types of papers; These papers have ranged from memoirs to research papers. Different papers serve different purposes. For example, a research paper serves to inform, while an analysis paper serves to take a deeper look at a work or character. Nonetheless, each paper requires a different approach, and has compelled me to take the different skills that I have learned in class and incorporate them into the paper. Throughout this course I have acquired skills that improve my writing and communication skills. Through these assignments I have learned how to properly cite sources, incorporate outside sources into my writing, as well as analyze information to strengthen my argument.

I grew up in an Adventist home, both my parents are teachers for an Adventist school and my grandpa is a pastor for the SDA church. I don’t have one of those stories of not knowing God or learning about him in a miraculous way. When growing up I went to church every Sabbath and didn’t question it because that was what we did. I got baptized by my grandpa when I was twelve, and started going to my church’s youth group every Wednesday. I continued this lifestyle for a while, it wasn’t until high school that I started to become more relaxed with my relationship with God. It started with me skipping church, I skipped because I would be too tired to get up that early, or it was because I would go on backpacking trips. My senior year of high school is when my relationship with God hit rock bottom, I had two people close to me die. One was a friend that I knew from going on mission trips and seeing them at Walla Walla tournaments, the other was my best friend since kindergarten. They died decently close to each other, and it made me question the existence of God. I would ask myself if there was a God why wouldn’t he save them. Both like me grew up Christian, and both were more involved in the church and showing others God. After that I stopped going to church all together except when I wanted to see my friends. That summer I worked at camp, and while it was a good experience I still hadn’t forgiven God. I got to the point where I knew that there was a God, but couldn’t care less

Throughout their high school careers, everyone, even those who think that they have learned nothing, have learned something. This isn’t any different for me. The lessons of my high school career and my high school extracurricular activities helped me develop a strong foundation of independence, a sense that trying to be like everyone else does not make you a better person. This independence has led me to life paths that others would not pursue. These paths helped me develop important life skills, such as leadership and communication. They also led me to opportunities that I would not have found without that strong foundation of independence – being myself, not just a mold of others.

They enveloped me like the saltwater of the ocean, the words sporadically dragging me down. I had always excelled at math and science; however, when it came to writing, especially about myself, I was an ordinary student. I hoped that at some point, spontaneously, my ability to write would be revamped to match my skills in problem-solving. Unfortunately, that point never came, and I had to learn how to substitute many of the words I used with larger, more descriptive words. Even so, my struggle with writing persisted, and the assignments continued to pour in. Eventually, I discovered that my conflict with essays and other compositions was due, in part, to my displeasure of writing about myself and my experiences. My aversion to writing has always been natural. Although, I learned that this abhorrence is reduced when I focus on a topic that interests me or when I control my writing’s development and outcome. The only type of writing that I had ever produced in school was the overly structured essays that were focused on me/myself. I assumed that no other approaches existed; however, I eventually discovered which elements of the writing process that were the roots of my displeasure.

At a young age, I have always dealt with internal issues such as anxiety. Art is one way I could let myself become calm, it has always been there for me when I needed it, but it soon became a problem once I was made aware that Islam would not allow my way of coping. As an aspiring artist I was told by my Islamic teachers that drawing images, anything with a soul, is a mockery to Allah and his ability to create! According to them, I was honoring the man-made idols that were worshipped by the people of Madinah eventually leading them astray in the times of prophets, that I would be punished for my sin. Soon after though, I would see the broad perspective of religion and belief. For many years, I have been told that nothing else was the truth, except for Islam. With so many days spent inside my home, four years of being in an Islamic private school, and being fed nothing but traditional Islamic ideals and opinions, I would grow up to have a closed mind to the Liberal American way. I countered their overwhelming claims. I came to understand that I had the power to make my own decisions in life and that I could determine what made me happy, what made me a good person, even if that meant rebelling against the way I was raised and taught to live since birth. This was the toughest decision of my life.

A few weeks go I was standing awkwardly in the commons area of my church. Teenagers surrounded me all of which were avoiding eye contact, absorbed into their phones. “No worries,” I thought, “It’s all good.” Then, I heard a scream, “Mrs. Farmer!” One sweet young lady grabbed a hold of me so tight I could hardly breathe, but I was so grateful. Then, I realized it was one of my students from the first full year of teaching. This young lady came from the most difficult home life, and I could hardly imagine what she went through, but no matter what–every day she came to school with a bright smile on her face. She inspired me every day as a teacher that year, and seeing her again just brightened my day. What struck me the most about our conversation was that she remembered dancing in my class and how much she loved it, and it meant so much to her. It’s truly moments like that, moments we’ve all had, that remind us why we became teachers–why it’s such a gift.

I don’t think women are truly appreciated for the fierce warriors that they are. I think the downside to my gender is the “period”. I have been plagued with that since I was nine and I can tell you I’m not going to miss it when it’s gone. One experience that I remember particularly growing up was at my high school. A male teacher suggested that math wasn’t for girls and I should go take a economics class and learn to sex something. He didn’t like my response and I was kicked out of class and happy to be away from a narrow-minded misogynistic man. I think one thing that this experience has taught me is that basic respect for people should be given to all equally not just one group.

I thought I was perfect. I was smarter, faster, and stronger than my classmates. I got straight A+’s and all my teachers appreciated my hard work. I was, literally, perfect. Or so I thought. During class, taking tests, and during P.E., I constantly had a terrible attitude, because I was bored, tired, and uninterested in the learning material. I didn’t realize how you did your work was just as important as doing the work itself. I looked down on those who got grades lower than an A+. I was also arrogant. My self - confidence resulted in my no friends. And I didn’t care. I felt I was too smart for everyone else.

Some may think that America is the best place for opportunities, but some people don’t know that equal opportunities are not given to everyone, even in places where opportunity is abundant. Latinos, as one of the largest minorities in the United States are people who have had to fight for their equality in the past but things are still not as equal as they may seem. You are fairly young and may not fully understand many things about the world and why things are the way they are. As you grow, your eyes will open up to other worlds which we do not belong in. As Latinos, it is true that some have it better than us. You may notice a difference in areas such as education, but you should never feel inferior to anyone and work hard to not let your our identity stop you from achieving whatever you want.