Personal Statement : Hanging Out With The Wrong Crowd

Let me start off by saying this reading really opened up my eyes. It’s crazy that there is so much that comes into consideration when being apart of a society. High school is a big part of many people’s lives, they need to make it out big in the hallways. This means that people will do anything in their power just to fit in with the “cool kids”. In reality there is such a thing of a higher status and a lower status, but the fact that in high schools it’s a huge problem is sad. When I was in high schools, which wasn’t that long ago, this was a big problem. People needed to have the hottest clothes, shoes, phones, and music, in order to just be recognized. The funny thing is was that, the “nerds” were very high in demand as well. The cool kids wanted to be on their side as

Most people know that it is hard growing up. Daniel Siegal and Erin Ross argue that being an adolescent can be the hardest part of growing up, and how some teenagers go through similar challenges while they're in their growth as an adolescent. Similar texts like "Popularity", by Adam Bagdasarian, "Momentum", by Catherine Doty and "The Party", by Pam Munoz Ryan explain why people need to belong to a group, intense emotions and risk taking behavior. Because of this, it is clear that adolescence is a difficult time due to peer pressure, risk taking behavior and intense emotions. The first reason why being an adolescent is difficult is because teenagers have a strong need to belong to a group.

Every public school lunch room is filled with many tables, every day these tables are the perfect place for a student to find where they “belong”. Like Beverly Daniel Tatum states in “Why Are all the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?”, part of the social groups forming in high schools goes to thank adolescents. Tatum writes, “As children enter adolescence, they begin to explore the question of identity, asking ‘Who am I?’ ‘Who can I be?’”(375). At this point in their life everyone begins to see their own interests and hobbies that makes them a little different than others. Because students are starting to realize their differences, in modern day high schools there are many social groups that students can identify with and feel the most comfortable being themselves.

Being a freshman, in a new school, a new city, even a new state, frightened me going into my first day of school as a high school attendee. Chaparral High School in Phoenix, Arizona was considered to be the top high school in the state of Arizona, however it sure was not for me. There was an ample amount of kids who believed they were better than the kid next to them because of the money their parents possessed. This characteristic began to grow on me; without my own awareness. Furthermore, I began to talk back to my parents, acted as a terrible brother to both my two younger brothers who looked up to me, as well as, my friends back in El Paso, Texas did not even want to talk to me. I had become a monster in all my friend’s eyes.

Middle school was the point in every middle scholar’s life to find a group where they fit in. These groups were called cliques, a group centered around gossiping about others and even gossiping about one another in the group. In middle school this group became your community. The group you do everything with and told everything to. This group is almost like your other family. Sadly, this community, the people you surround yourself with can lead to negative thinking about others. Your community can easily persuade your actions and thoughts because the people you surround yourself with have such a big influence on your life.

The school year approached its end. Another summer to spend alone by myself. The cycle had been repeating since I was in grade school. Sadness choked me as I returned home and shut my door. Every year, the resolution was the same: I would try to make friends next year; however, every year, I felt myself falling back down into the same trap. By the time high school began, I no longer felt the numb sensation of sadness or the flow of tears as the final day of May became the last day I talked with my “friends.” I no longer expected to make any friends, or, more accurately, I no longer expected to be able to make any friends. The sheer possibility of befriending an individual appeared to me as foreign as speaking in latin. When I walked into school, what should have been a site of chatter, opportunity, and growth appeared to me as a form of imprisonment and torture; however, unbeknownst to me, I did have friends; something of which I did not recognize until years passed by. I grown attached to certain conversations; there were times where I felt the need to initiate a conversation rather than waiting for someone else to make one. It was not until one of my friends told me,”We’re your friends aren’t we?” when I realized I was not longer

More than ever in this society as children find the need to belong or fit in to the popular crowd in school for acceptance they often tend to mimic their friends behaviors. This is often a result of the individual child trying to find him or herself. The results however, are not always negative. In fact, there are some positive results that may occur as a result of copying their peers. Simply stated, “When teens surround themselves with people who make good decisions and who are involved with positive activities and choices, it makes the adolescent child want to be better” (Stock, 2010 pg.2). Positive peers influence adolescents and can drive the child toward improved confidence, and improved grades in school. Inversely, the same can be said for the adolescent child who decides that he or she wants to be like his or her friends who have a negative influence. Children who fall into this category are those that are of the bandwagon philosophy. Those negatively impacted by peers often show signs of lower grades in school, increased distance from family. In fact, “peer pressure can lead to experimentation with drugs and alcohol, and various high risks behaviors” (Fact Sheets, 2009 pg.1). The changes in the adolescent child can have lasting effects depending on which type of peer influences that child may be surrounded by. The negative impact of peer pressure can be strong; however there are also positive influences.

I’m sure many have shared stories of their high school experiences and can relate when I say those four years have taught me many lessons. During this time, I’d come face to face with the fraudulent friendships, temporary romances, and other high school dramas that my parents once warned me about—those of which I simply brushed off as myths. It wasn’t the 90’s anymore— times have changed and people are different—or at least, that’s what I thought.

The story “Way too cool” by Brenda Woods is an outlandish story because the main character Aston James changes twice. Before the change he was a teenage norm, trying to comprehend where he belongs and who he really is. The change occurs when he realizes that not being yourself is not cool but foolish. However in the end he changes back to Mr. Cool due to peer pressure and to maintain his stature. Through this last change the author helps me understand that peer pressure negatively affects one’s decision-making skills and self-esteem. This story also gives me an insight into why students give up or even commit suicide due to their peers.

There are so many events that change one’s life that it is rather difficult to try and decipher which of those events are most important. Each event changes a different aspect of your life, molding how one’s personality turns out. One of these events occurred when I was about twelve years old and I attempted to steal from a Six Flags amusement park. My reasoning for stealing wasn’t that I didn’t have the money, or even that I wanted what I stole all that badly, it was that all of my friends had stolen something earlier that day and didn’t get caught. After getting caught I resolved, because the consequences are just not worth it, never to steal or give into peer pressure again.

A life lesson that I have learned over the course of my high school years, is you need to choose wisely which crowd of people to hang around. I’ve learned that not everyone is your friend, even if they tell you they are. There are people out there who will claim to be your friend, and will stab you in the back when you least expect it.

For four long years I felt as if my high school was in a different world in of itself. I had spent that time interacting with an extensive amount of groups, or “cliques”, and getting to know what they do. Through my experiences, I had begun to realize what made this “subculture” high school of sorts run like it did. High school is an incredibly dynamic time for people, and I had changed as a person dramatically from my freshman to senior year. Like many, my freshman year was quite awkward, as remnants of my middle school self remained with me. As time went on, how, I talked to more people and grew out of my passive and shy personality. This did not just randomly happen without reason though. I began to learn and realize who I was and whom I enjoyed talking to in school, which explained why I spent so much time socializing with multiple kinds and groups of people. Everyone’s concept of “normal” was different, and high school was where I learned that lesson and will never forget.

Students in the classroom come from a variety of backgrounds. Their lives are shaped by their families, their communities, but also their peers in school whom they will spend hours a day with throughout their educational career. The ability to form relationships with others, to create lasting friendships that grow and evolve with time, is detrimental to all children and their development. Lacking the ability to do so, whether it is directly because of their conditions or because of how other students perceive them, can dramatically harm them emotionally and mentally.

The students who do not adapt and choose to abstain are immediately labeled negatively. By choosing not to participate in the universal activity on campus, these students limit their social life. This is a tremendous sacrifice. College supposedly represents the best years a person’s of life. No one wants to miss out due to being perceived as overwrought and uptight. For this reason,

When I was younger, I had a friend that would not usually do the right thing over the wrong thing. For example, if this person were to find a ring on the floor, she would not turn it into lost and found, she would keep it. There was one time where she got in trouble for having something that was not hers. When I realised what happened I made sure to never in my life do something like that. I then distant myself from that person, and went on with my own life. This taught me that I should always be honest and never take something that does not belong to me. I also learned how to choose my friends wisely, which I make sure to do when I meet new people. Events like this in my life is what helps me grow into the person I am