Some people may look at me and think I'm the happiest person in the world. I have a family, I have friends, and I live a lifestyle most would love to have. I’m a senior in college; with less than a few weeks from graduating with my bachelors in applied engineering and technology, and I have huge plans for my future. I’m graduating in four years, which is something that seems hard to do in today’s society. I can admit that these have been the hardest four years of my life, but not because I have a problem with struggling in academics. My struggles stem from my mental illnesses of anxiety and depression.
I look back at my life and think, wow; I had it really good most of the time. But I don’t remember the last time I was actually happy. Sure,
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I sabotage situations because subconsciously I prefer the certainty of a negative outcome over a high degree of uncertainty that comes with a positive outcome. This keeps me from doing almost anything and everything. My anxiety is constantly through the roof. The more I live like this, the more I realize how badly depression is affecting my life. I understand the biology behind depression, what it takes to get over it, what it takes to cope with it, but I still can’t get myself motivated to get out of it. It’s like I’m purposely letting myself be depressed. The only thing I can think of why I’m doing this is because its the most alive I’ve felt my whole life. I’ve never felt this much emotion before for an extended period of time. I think I’m addicted to it. I’ve started to identify myself with it. I love it because it makes me feel alive, but I fucking hate …show more content…
It’s so much more than just one day deciding to end it. It goes deeper than that, way deeper. It’s years of torment and agony within your own head, even on your best days. It usually doesn’t happen just randomly, it’s more of a build up. It’s not something that turns off and on, it comes in waves, it peaks and it fades. But these feelings never actually disappear; they quietly sit in the back of your mind and attack when you’re most vulnerable. I don’t want to die; my sub-conscious and my illnesses may disagree, but I know I’m stronger than
Major depression is a commonly diagnosed psychological disorder affecting individuals’ ability to feel happiness and peace of mind. Those who suffer experience negative emotions, lack of motivation, changes in behaviour and dysfunctional cognitive symptoms. Depression is classified by the Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders Fifth Edition (DSM-5) as five of more of the listed symptoms present persistently over the same two weeks. One of these symptoms must be depressed mood or loss of interest in previously pleasurable activities. Depression causes disruption to typical daily life such as inability to maintain friendships and jobs. Other symptoms outlined by the DSM-5 include; insomnia, fatigue and recurrent thoughts of death. There is much debate over what exactly causes depression. Biological explanations question hereditary and neurotransmitter factors. While psychological theories include the cognitive ideas of Beck’s negative triad and hopelessness theory. This essay will focus on the ways in which psychological and biological explanations contrast and how their theories can overlap to better understand depression.
My name is (student name) and I am 29 years old, living with my spouse in a rented place and working in a Bank as a relationship executive. We knew each other very well before getting married and used to see each other in college. We got married about two years back and my wife immediately wanted kids but we have not yet conceived although the doctor says everything is normal.
When you’re asleep, the pain stops. There are no thoughts or ideas that run through your brain, you are emotionless. I wish I could feel like that now, all the thoughts start to get to you’re head. At times I wish that I could end it, just to stop the pain. But I need to stay alive, to make sure they’re all okay. Afterwards, I can do as I like but right now, they are my main priority. I can't lose them, they are my one and only family. If they’re gone, then i'm nobody. I just need to go, the longer I wait the more I put myself at risk. Even though I hate myself for what i’ve done, I still need to stay
The popular Disney film, Beauty and the Beast, the beloved character, Beast, seems to have the characteristics of depression, and learned helplessness. Martin Seligman began an experiment of shocking dogs in 1956. His study involved evaluating the reaction to a dog being allowed to escape during being shocked. Some of these animals were classically conditioned to associate the ringing of a bell to a shock given. Within the next few experiments, the dogs would either run away at the sound of a bell or show a fear related behavior. For some of the dogs used in the experiment, although get could escape the enclosure from a shock, they didn't, they just sat there and took the pain; Seligman explained this as being “Learned Helplessness”.
According to Image vision, there are many reasons why a person may want plastic surgery. This may be due to social acceptability, change of facial muscles, aging, removal of scars and moles, skin diseases, change gender, and facial trauma (Michele Nappia Stefano Ricciardia MassimoT istarell, 2016). Over time, the surgery may change the facial features enough that the person's face is unrecognizable. is up to the patient to have surgery. Plastic surgery is related to a complex of social
College can be extremely hard, emotionally and intellectually. Students are thrown into an environment where they have to become completely self-sufficient, if they weren’t already, and find out who they want to be. Classes are harder and the homework is more involved, and we are expected know what right and wrong is, in a world full of completely wrong choices happening around us. Simply put, college is stressful and confusing, but wonderful at that. Some students find themselves struggling with alcohol, or dating. My struggle over the past year has been my inability to ask for help with depression.
are happy when they achieve something or saddened when they fail a test or lose
I could have distanced myself from my friends and let my grades drop due to having a hopeless outlook on life; however, I wanted a solution, not sympathy. Therefore, I channeled my frustrations into working harder than ever before in my academics, which I recognized as the only pathway to ever changing my circumstances for not only myself but for my future family. I graduated in the top 5% of my class with a 4.1 GPA, automatic admission to every public university in Texas, and over $200,000 in scholarships to my top choices. I achieved so much and I had so little but something that I did have was drive. My work ethic flourished and I learned perseverance, an invaluable trait as an aspiring doctor and
pushed to think of happy times it is a time consuming process. People vary, which
Sadness is how the human being reacts to the loss of a loved one, the struggles of life, the disappointments, and the frustrations. Although it is a normal feeling in all these situations, there is a broad difference between being sad and being depressed. Unlike normal feelings of sadness, depression overwhelms a person, last a long time, and interferes with his or her day-to-day life. According to the World Health Organization in 2010, depression was reported as the most common mental disorder; it affects 120 million people globally and is among the leading causes of disability. The person that suffers from depression has to deal with being misunderstood and under-diagnosed on a daily basis, which leaves the patient with physical,
In my autobiography, I went into detail about being biracial, open-minded, and depressed. I did mention other traits, for instance being Buddhist, low-middle class, and being nineteen years of age. I just focused more on the first three because I think they all went hand in hand. Being biracial means I am combination of two different races. I used to hate being mixed and sometimes I still do, but having this physical trait has helped me be more compassionate towards others who are different. I always feel out of place when I’m with certain groups of people. Sometimes they’ll make sure to mention that I’m different than the rest of them. I think being biracial has helped me become open-minded but is also a cause of my depression.
Do you find yourself making the same mistake in various guises and repeating negative thought and behaviour patterns no matter how hard you try? Do you blame others for the situations in your life and not take full responsibility? If you answered yes to both questions, there's probably a self-limiting belief lurking around that is obstructing you from joy.
1. No matter how hard we try to prepare ourselves for challenging experiences and try to stay positive, it becomes harder to do than planned when the time comes. It was the end of the last semester and I was on the verge of emotional depression that totally overwhelmed me. During the exam period, I wasted my weekends on the Internet, chatting and Facebook-ing. I needed to submit an important paper on Tuesday morning. On Sunday night, after wasting so much time of mine and having a little red eyes because of so much exposure to electronic screens, I sat down to write my paper. Only then did I realize that the paper was due the next morning, not on Tuesday. I was extremely nervous because it was too little a time to finish it. Moreover, I was so angry with myself that I wanted to cry. It was a realization that I was off course in my study habits and that I had not overcome my habit of willingly putting myself in difficult positions. The more I thought about being in that mess, the angrier I got with myself. I got even angrier thinking about how it was not the first time in my life that I put myself in such a situation. I could not concentrate on my paper because of that emotional response. Then suddenly I thought that I just needed to talk to someone and calm down. I called my classmate and just told her about everything. She said that the instructor had actually extended the deadline until Thursday. It was such a relief. I thanked her profusely and decided
The term depression is widely misused in today’s society. All human beings experience periods in life where they are sad for a relatively short period of time, which is considered normal. Those who experience sadness for extended periods may be suffering from depression. Two terms used to reference the classifications of depression, are Major Depressive Disorder, and Dysthymia. Individual diagnosis of these classifications is dependent on the length of time, and severity of symptoms experienced by the individual. The causes for these depressive states can be due to genetics or the insufficient production of neurotransmitters, which provide the brain with the data necessary to regulate one's psychological well being. Two examples
By doing this experiment I learned that people generally focus too much on the negative things in the world and end up making themselves feel like victims. And they don’t pay enough attention to the little things in the world that add up to make for a life that’s worth living. People love to recall all of the bad things that happen to them throughout the day, but really things don’t happen to people, things just happen. There are probably an equal amount of good things and bad things, so the trick to getting through life and making yourself happy is to control how you respond to the world. If you focus on the bad and