I could never have my father’s smile or my mother’s eyes, and my skin tone will never match theirs. Their Swedish and Irish blood cannot be traced in my veins. I am a Chinese-American raised in a caucasian household. Neither I, nor my siblings are related by blood. Growing up in this unique household has given me a life and future that I would never have, if I wasn’t adopted. My family’s loving spirit influenced my positive attitude towards acceptance. When I traveled back to China to adopt my younger sister, I saw the world from a different perspective. Traveling back to my birth country shaped me to become the person I am today by equipping me with experiences that helped me become open-minded.
One of the first things I learned in China was that I did not grow up with an understanding of the concept of
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One of the immediate things I learned in China was that I did not entirely understand my own values. Growing up in the United States, I felt the prosperity of wealth seemed greater than the qualities of love, humanity, and happiness. I questioned the value of money, whether it was the entry to the doors of contemptment, or if it is a barren dream waiting to be lived. As the frequent stops at restaurants became an ordinary occurrence on my family’s itinerary, I noticed the difference in cultural values. I saw people lose track of time because they invested their attention on each other, rather than checking their phone. I realized I should treasure my time spent with others, since nothing else ranks a greater superiority over living in the moment. Seeing people appreciate companionship showed me the values of love and happiness are derived from living actively and feeling important to others. Understanding cultural values has influenced my mindfulness to strive to live my life to the fullest while embodying the quality of awareness to who I am as a person and what I
When I was eight years old I would question my mom on if I was adopted or not. I got the subject of conversation from little kids I used to play with when I was younger they would ask me why I looked so different from my mom and brother but I could never give a solid answer because I myself didn’t even know. I have an older sister and brother, my sister is dark skin and my brother is a light skin like my mom. Radisha my eldest sister was gone for four years due to personal issues, so I only had my mom and brother and because they were both light skin I would ask why I didn’t look like them. Mother had told me it was because I looked like my father and when my sister had come home it had all made
In today’s society, the words “education” and a “better life” fit hand and hand with the other. The desire to create a higher quality lifestyle and the thirst for knowledge is a recurring theme in The Achievement of Desire. Much like Richard Rodriguez, my parents were not native to America and therefore, learning a new language and adapting to the culture was an indefinite struggle. Growing up, many Americans perceived my family and I as “too Chinese” and in the eyes of the Chinese, I was “too American”; this concept was only intensified after my trip to China in 2011. The addition of Western-style education in the household of a second generation American family unintentionally alienates the family members who participate in the schooling
Where we come from is a huge issue. Just as scientists debate the origin of man and the universe, adopted children can have questions about their genetic roots. Questions like: “Why do I look like this?”, “Why do I have these health problems?”, and “Why do I have these emotional issues?” go unanswered if biological parents are never known. In a study of adoptive families, parents were asked how they felt years after their open adoptions. One
Their mentality constantly fueled them to escape the hole of poverty that relentlessly sucked us in. They imparted the persistence of Chinese ethos to me and encouraged me to apply it to my academic endeavors. I began to ask for help from teachers after school and toiled each evening to master the language. By the end of the year, I was deemed advanced. I had tasted the rewards of hard work. I finally understood why my parents had clutched the persistent beacon of hope in the darkness of poverty and
life lessons that they have learned in China and teaching it to them here in America. The parables
One of the most common scenarios we think of when hearing the phrase, “transracial adoption”, is a white family bringing an African American baby into their home. However, that is not always the case. Transracial adoption means the joining together of racially diverse parents and children together into an adopted family. Many families have had the life changing opportunity of adopting a child into their home, whether the child is African American, Chinese, or Vietnamese, that has shaped the family into something even stronger. People should consider interracial adoption because children are able to benefit from a different ethnic background as well as provide a cultural abundant experience for the whole family.
My parents sent me to China soon after I was born to be in the care of my grandparents due to financial circumstances. For five years, I regarded my grandparents as my parental figures, and I always questioned why my “parents” were so old compared to my friends’ parents. I realized the truth the first time my mom called me and my grandparents told me who she was. After that phone call, my parents started to call me more frequently, and I always asked them questions about their life, as I was curious. Usually, I would forget these conversations, but sometimes, after a call, I wondered how different their lives were from mine’s; I imagined them as being wealthy and living in a big house. While I enjoyed talking to them, I never imagined the day that I would receive the shocking news that I was going to move to America to live with my
Perhaps the main concern for transracial adoptees concerning their racial situation involves their sense of identity, divided between racial and personal (Deberry 2377). One study worth mention concerning racial identity used the Clark and Clark Doll Test, which features two dolls with dark and light skin, and found only a seven percent difference between the black identification of transracial black adoptees to inracial black adoptees (Morrison 182). Regarding personal identities, outcome studies suggest that TRAs are not necessarily more prone than same-race adoptees or nonadoptees to emotional or behavioral problems, low self-esteem, or maladjustments (Lee 4). During a twenty year follow-up on Chinese children adopted transracially to Britain, the researchers concluded that adoptees and nonadoptees developed self-esteem and social adjustment on the same level (Lee 4). A study in 1977 that interviewed transracially adopting parents throughout the United States found their black children emotionally healthy (Morrison 181). A second concern for the psychological and social effects of TRA considers whether a transracially adopted child adjusts well into a racially different environment. According to a 1983 study, racial differences do not inhibit transracial adoptees from developing typical relationships any less than inracial adoptees (Morrison 182). Furthermore, racial differences may strengthen the parent-child relationship, as it “reinforces that the family’s foundation is based on bonds of relationship, not…biology” (Morrison 188). Studies have indicated the healthy racial identities, the healthy personal identities, and the relationship enabling of racial differences as proof of psychological and social benefits of transracial
When I came to America from China at age 16, everyone around me appeared to be different. However, I didn’t just talk to my Chinese friends. I pushed myself outside of my bubble; I tried my best to make friends with American students, while I still maintained good relationships with my Chinese friends. America is very different from what I expected, everyone speaks so fast and unclear; it almost made English a completely different language from what I had already learned. As I was trying to make friends, I realized that Chinese culture had made me different from Americans; things that I was curious about as a Chinese person were very private to American students. For example, in America, people won’t mention what their parents’ jobs are when they meet someone for the first time.
One experience so far in China that left a strong impression on my mind was a visit to the Shaanxi museum of history. Our tour guide was a locally educated young woman in her twenties. As she took us through the different periods of Chinese history, at every exhibit showing some sort of tool or mechanistic contraption she would turn and say “as you can see, the Chinese people are very smart!” She also recounted a story in which she was very offended that an American made a comment that Chinese people are short, to which she replied “yes, we are, but we have five thousand years of history and culture!” Both the richness and vastness of Chinese history was a huge source of pride for her, as her slightly illogical response to the American’s comment shows. In retrospect, her age denotes that she grew up on the government’s campaign in the 1990s to educated students about China’s greatness, to foster pride.
I immigrated to America with my family five years ago and received an education that is impossible to gain in China. Some may not know this, but access to college is very competitive and one’s social status plays a significant role to China’s economy. Therefore, my parents made an very important decision, which was to leave my mother country and step in a foreign country that is America. Here, I am able to experience mountains of obstacles and learn how to solve these complex life cases.
Children who are pulled out of their normal environment and inserted into different surroundings face an identity crisis due to the importance of identity in determining who one truly is. In a study, Trolly, Wallin, and Hansen discovered that fewer than fifty percent of the parents of foreign children felt that their children were only somewhat aware of their birth culture (Hollingsworth 48:209). These children lack a sense of who they really are and later in life will become confused on why they differ from their new families. Though it is often a painful topic that parents choose not to bring up, it is important that children understand their background because it results in a better quality of life. However, the prevalence of “cultural socializations” was low amongst Caucasian families who adopted Asian children (Deater-Deckard, Johnston, Petrill, Saltsman, and Swim 56:390). It is made clear that Westerners lack the cultural knowledge necessary to properly educate their internationally adopted children about the culture the children come from. This can result in a variety of psychological implications due to the significant effect of identity on the health of people of color (Deater-Deckard, Johnston, Petrill, Saltsman, and Swim 56:390). These implications tend to be internalized rather than externalized. In the same study, Chinese adoptees displayed the possibility of behavior such as hyperactivity, aggression,
Being of Chinese heritage means I am at the heart of multiculturalism that many would say defines Britain today. Growing up as a British Asian however being raised in the United States in the last decade has allowed me to experience life embedded in a world of culture, politics, and diversity, not only from a Western perspective but also that of other cultures.The tug from all ends of my identity has led to a willingness to understand the different perspectives of my identity. From having the opportunity to grow up in America and having parents who installed traveling within me from a early age, I have got to witness over 17 different countries all around the world learning divergent cultures, languages, and peoples way of life has inspired
Throughout life I have experienced numerous events that have shaped me into becoming the person I am to this day. Out of all these events, my adoption has been the most significant and life changing event of my life. Two weeks before my first birthday in, I was adopted from Nanchang, China. As I grew up, my parents never once tried to conceal my adoption. Without them, I believe I would have grown to be a totally different person. Although I was adopted and brought in by my adoptive parents, I see myself in the everyday. I see them as nothing less than my real parents and I aspire to be as generous and compassionate as they are. Without them, I would have never been able to experience half of the life changing events I have gone through. As
Now I have a much better understanding of China, the country I have lived in for