We loaded our stuff into the vehicle and got in, Larry slamming the driver door, starting the engine, and I thought I heard him say, “Just goes to show you that the good die young.”
“God, Larry, that’s a pretty lousy thing to say. We don’t know anything about that old man and…” I dabbed at my neck but no matter how much I wiped the spot, I could still feel his spittle.
Larry put his foot on the brake and said, “What on earth did you think I said?”
“You said that the good die young, which is a pretty shitty thing to say about that pathetic old man.”
“It would be a shitty thing to say if I had said it, but that’s not what I said.” He put the vehicle in gear and eased onto the street. “I said ‘Just goes to show you that it’s good to die young.’
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I told him about my life as a paramedic, my “professional women” friends, Tami’s gray hair (she would kill me), and finally, stumbling a bit, I told him about the old man and the silent “monster” that wouldn’t leave me, that haunted and tormented me.
“Does death bother you?” he asked. “You must see it often enough in your line of work.”
“It always bothers me, but I know it…it has to be sometimes…and sometimes we do save them and they go back to their lives and we made that happen…” I trailed off, giving up on expressing my complex thoughts and reactions to death, and I climbed up the spa steps. Somehow he was in front of me, soundless motion, as quiet as I wanted to feel.
Donovan put his hands on my shoulders, his cool touch filling me with finality, and said, “I think you will sleep well tonight. Why don’t you come to the club day after tomorrow—I mean evening after tomorrow evening?” We both smiled.
He leaned down and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek and then, a little peck on my neck. “I may have a surprise for
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Instead, I got a bite to eat, did some errands, and came back to Bodies Day & Night in the evening. Will he remember? I asked myself. I hoped he would, and then I hoped he wouldn’t. He was intimidating without being physical, this Donovan of the mysterious eyes and breath-taking body, the night trainer, the star of Bodies Day & Night. And he would have a surprise for me!
What could it be? I wondered. I turned over various possibilities in my mind: free training sessions with him (oh boy), introductions to some firefighters who could help me get into the department, what? I knew the club like I knew like my own front door. Maybe he’s going to try to palm off a stray kitten or puppy on me, I thought. If Donovan did that, he had an instinct for spotting an easy touch, which I was. One puppy whimper or piteous meow, and I would end up setting another place at my table, or rather, on my floor.
The sun set outside, and I felt invigorated, my slight headache eased by comforting shadows. The front door opened to let in a cool breeze followed by Donovan and a companion, both walking straight toward me. Donovan wore his good looks with his usual easy grace, but his companion’s face and form froze
“I still couldn’t comprehend that this might be a matter of life and death, that this was the most serious thing I’d ever been involved in.”
Tonight he wouldn’t get much sleep. He hugged his arms to his chest and let his teeth chatter. He hadn’t been this cold since he had nearly drowned trying to escape more than a year ago. “It’s warmer in the cabin if you want.” Called Peter’s hesitant voice.”
“You’d be surprised how hard that’d be. I won’t live to see the law changed, and if you live to see it you’ll be an old man.”
“That was a long time ago, but it’s wrong what they say about the past, I’ve learned, about how you can bury it. Because the past claws its way out.”
“Even if wars didn’t keep coming like glaciers, there would still be plain old death.”
“Yeah, well don’t get used to it,” I reply, “I can’t save your life every time you’re endanger.”
I ran towards him. “Don’t touch...” I cut him off with a hug. He pushed me away “goddammit don’t touch me” he said. “Why what’s wrong” I asked. “your mother she… she died shortly after you left, and…” he reached for his collar and showed his neck, there were small black bubo’s on it and a
“It made him feel a little uncomfortable sometimes when he reflected that the good little boys always died. He loved to live, you
It was my first day on the job with Lyric. I was moderately eager to meet him. When I first encounter new clients, I do not know what to expect. I became accustomed to walking into people’s homes blindfolded without expectations. I knocked before I entered Lyrics home at 8PM that Friday evening. I was greeted by the CNA that I was releasing off of her shift. I quickly noticed that the room’s atmosphere radiated an aura of coffee. The smell was quite pleasant and homey. I could distinguish the scent of the coffee beans mixed with vanilla. The CNA stood in front of me as she informed me that Lyric had a great day. I put on my warming smile as I introduced myself to Lyric. He smiled at me and told me hello. After the other CNA left, I provided Lyric with my company and began to get to know him better. Lyric lived in a two-bedroom, two-bathroom suite. The sight of his room was pretty welcoming. The beige curtains matched up well with the brown carpet of the apartment. I ran my hands along the silk curtains as I closed them. The curtains felt so soft and delicate as if they were made from the same material of my silk black gown in my room closet. I sat down on the chair next to Lyric’s recliner that he was sitting in. I watched him as he thought out loud about schedule for the next
“George, Lennie wasn’t in any pain. Don’t beat yourself up. Obviously the other men in there know you did the right thing-”
“I always heard that when you die, there’s a bright light at the end of a tunnel. That and all your loved ones are there to meet you.”
Donovan had lapsed into silence too, staring out the window. She worried he was concerned about the meeting to come. She reached out and touched his hand. He flashed his eyes at her. She did not read the worry she expected but a boyish humor.
“Yeah, I know the thing I did was horrible, but life is too much,” Mikey said. “I don’t think I deserve to be here.
“I’m sorry, but your parents are dead,” she replied. “The system overheated and the engine blew up. The fire started in the front of the car, and your parents couldn’t do anything about it. You were lucky that somebody called the fire department in time to get there, before you got burned down to your bone.”
Priam looks up at him in dismissal saying, “Do you really think death frightens me now? I watched my eldest son die, watched your drag his