My Father Is A Positive Father

Working in the helping field has its many joys and privileges. Seeing a child, whose self esteem is at the bottom, light up when he/she accomplishes a new task, see the growth an alcohol and drug addict has made in treatment, or to see the family, that when they entered the door of your office, was on the verge of separation, but now are communicating and working out their own needs with little assistance from you, their therapist, is some of the most rewarding moments one can experience. However, to believe that life is all about these positive moments and that the battles you join in with others to overcome will not have an impact on you

Over the course of several months, I had the opportunity to observe several support groups in my local community. I inquired information regarding how each group benefits its members, characteristics in which contribute to its success, and therapeutic factors found in its structure. Each group varied in its target demographic, agenda of sessions, and overall beliefs and philosophy. Below is an overview of my experiences at each group, including my observations incorporating support from scholarly research.

The effects of removing children from their parents deeply disturbed the parental/child relationship, and completely confused the parental role. Parenting skills that are discovered and learned by example were unfamiliar to Survivors, who had not experienced being parented. Those children grew up to be angry, distrusting, and resentful adults with no skills to deal with the emotions they were experiencing. The trauma caused by an abusive childhood, the inability to parent and substance abuse issues are all a continuation of the cycle of abuse from one generation to the next.

Although single parenthood is on the rise in homes today, children still often have a father role in their life. It does not matter who the part is filled by: a father, uncle, older brother, grandfather, etc...; in almost all cases, those relationships between the father (figure) and child have lasting impacts on the youth the rest of their lives. In “I Wanted to Share My Father’s World,” Jimmy Carter tells the audience no matter the situation with a father, hold onto every moment.

My father left when I was really young and I lived most of my life without him. To read an article about how a father can have a greater impact on a child and their psychological behavior fascinated me. Not having a father, I tend to live a decent life and I may have some issues. However, I live normal. Dads tend to have “unique” relationships with their kids and that could potentially be the reason for some children to experience psychological trouble. Dads can be strict and much scarier than their mother. Nevertheless, I do not live with a dad and I would not know. Overall, I chose this topic because I was able to connect it to myself and how different it is to my

Imagine a childhood where the father: who paid for toys, put food on the table, sat at dinner with

Even though I knew my father, he didn’t take the time of day to try to relieve some of the pressure off my mother. She had to find child care when she went to work, cook dinner for use every night, and help use with our homework. Hoffman states in his article that the U.S.-based National Fatherhood Initiative indicated that 34% of American children do not live with their biological father and of those children, 40% have not seen their father in the past year. Hoffman also describes the roles that mothers and fathers play in the household by saying that “mothers provide security and keep children close to them while fathers encourage exploration and serve to bring children out into the world”(Huffman). Although, I didn’t have a father in my household my mother and sometimes my uncles still provided me with the feel of being secure and encouragement to explore the world.

From the time period in my life from about age 3-7, were probably my worst years. Even after that I was still fat and got made fun of, but it took a heavier toll in those years. The first time I met my dad was when I was about three. In those years my dad beat me. I still to this day look back on it, but for some reason I have mixed feelings about it. Obviously no child should have to go through having their father abuse them, but sometimes I look at it as a way that toughened

It is during this time a father needs to be present to father, shape and mold his children (Jones, Kramer, Kim A., Teresa L., Armitage, Tracey, Williams, Keith, as cited in Wallerstein, 1980, 1987). On their 10 year follow up, Wallerstein and Kelley found that regardless of the time spent with a father or not, the father continued to be a significant presence psychologically to adolescents, particularly to boys (Jones et al., as cited in Wallerstein, Kelley, 1974). On Kelley and Wallerstein’s 25 year follow up of their now adult participants in their longitudinal study, they have found that the effects of fatherlessness and divorce during their adolescents were long lasting. The participants in the study by Wallerstein et al. (2000) noted that “The impact of divorce hits them most cruelly as they go in search of love, sexual intimacy, and commitment” (p. 299). These same participants also stated in an interview that they had anxiety issues about relationships and intimacy problems into adulthood (Jones et al., as cited in Wallerstein et al., 2000). Wallerstein et al. (2000) participants of the research also stated that they had resentment towards their parents, particularly the fathers who were seen “selfish and faithless” (p. 300).

The marriage really produced a lot of trust issues and fears that I have today. They got divorced and from then on it’s mainly been me and my mom. To return to the topic, my biggest suffering I would have to say stems from the situation with my father. I’ve been in some dark places even to the point where I didn’t want to live. Just felt unwanted, that something was wrong with me that my own father didn’t want me and that I was just a burden to my mom. The knowledge I’ve gained is that life is precious, I’m not a mistake, it’s not my fault, just his lost and that my mother is and has done the absolute best she can/could; she’s my greatest motivation. I’ve just had to grow and mature quicker, stay strong and accept things that I can’t control.

Growing up with a father that was never around and a father figure that also left was hard, but it taught me that I don’t need a father to rely on. I have myself and my mom, and as long as I don’t forget who I am I

Most people don’t remember when they first realized they had a father; I believe it’s life’s nature. Most of us grew up calling a man dad, and it simply was like that from the beginning. That is not my case. I grew up as a proud daughter of a single mother. I was fatherless for 11 years of my life, and I lived the struggles of not being able to say a word that should have been among the first. To me missing a father was not about the person, I was an orphan since the age of 2, and I had no memories of whom I was supposed to miss. However, I had a clear picture of what I wish for, and yet no one who could cover that role. I wouldn’t trade those days with anything though. My whole life, as it has been, has forged the person I am now. It made my heart able to understand true, deep and noble feelings, and how powerful they are. My not too common life has been a good ride; it brought me to a very special person in an unexpected moment.

Previous research findings theorized that the children who were exposed to recurring Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) and without regular father contact will more than likely have a higher level of internalizing and externalizing difficulties more so than those who are exposed to less frequent Intimate Partner Violence (IPV). Also, children in an Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) family may not have the “best relationships with their fathers, as they are found to have more conflict, resentment, and disappointment with their fathers” (Hunter & Graham-Bermann 's 2013).

"If you want to see stupid, look in the mirror". My memory of my dad for the past eighteen years has either been of a seemingly just impatient and mean person or of a person who has a horrible attitude due to his addiction. There are many things that can plague a person's life with hurt, but the one thing that gets me is the fact that I have an alcoholic father. It's been a difficult life with alcohol addiction because my dad's personality began to change for the worse, different parts of my life have been affected negatively, and I never met my grandfather due to his own addiction.

My dad, Michael, was born in California in 1961 and raised by his mom for the first portion of his life. While living with his mom, there was no importance placed on religion thus, no belief system in which the family followed. She eventually re-married when he was about six years old. The man she remarried, Gary, would end up having a huge role in the way my dad ended up growing up. Unfortunately Michael’s mom was often gone working two jobs leaving him at home alone with Gary, a very angry, unsympathetic and abusive body builder. My dad was abused often by Gary and found himself being terrified of even leaving his bedroom to use the bathroom in fear of the repercussion it would have with Gary. While living with his mom and Gary; there was little to no importance put into family norms such as conversation, communication, doing things as a family or even eating dinner together. There were no words of encouragement or