Headway
I always think how my life could be so different if I wasn’t so anxious and I was more social, outgoing, and confident. Like I could be doing amazing things, but I let my anxiety talk me out of it and I feel like I wasted so much time.
My iPod beeping waking me up to a new start of the day, my first day of middle school. As I lay down in bed, still half asleep, not wanting to move an inch. My heart drops hearing each pound, getting louder and louder; breathing heavily, knowing my anxiety came back for its daily visit. I know I had to get ready, so pushing myself up walking slowly towards the bathroom; Seeing my reflection having tearing eyes, but too afraid to tell my parents to not take me. Each minute passing my stomach dropping
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I retry my combination lock number so many times and the less students I see in the hallways, they are going into their class. Eventually, it open, I hurry to put my stuff away and went to my homeroom class. Turning red when I saw everyone already sitting down. Realizing there were assigned planners on tables, so I had to find my seat. There were a few empty seats, so I have to look and check which one is mine. When I was walking around I was so nervous, I could feel my face heating up and turning from my fair skin to a tomato. “Karina, your seat is right there.” Mr.Nelson, my teacher, said. I was relieve. Looking around to see who was in my class, some familiar faces and some not; but I did see this one girl who I use to talk to in 3rd grade, Sarahi, she also did not have anyone she knew of, so we became friends.
Throughout the day, it was pretty boring the teachers just introduced themselves and hoping they did not make us play icebreakers; luckily they did not. The best part of school is hearing the bells knowing that the less time I have to be in this rotten hole. “Ring!” that was the final bell; rushing to the doors and hoping into my mom’s car. “Cómo estuvo tu día?” my mom said asking how my day was. “Ok” I say. Walking into my room and thinking how I have to this everything made me breakdown and drift to
I had really enjoyed my life in Newmarket, but I was time to start my life in New York City. My dad got a job there, so my mom and I moved there with him. I really liked my last school and had lots of friends there that I would miss dearly. It was the first day of school and I didn't know what the kids at this school would think of me. As I walked to school, I wondered what my fate would be today. I was almost at school when I noticed something unusual. I noticed that all the kids at school walked in cliques. Nobody in a clique talked to others cliques, and it felt like they wanted to isolate themselves. This was weird for me due to the fact that at my old school, everyone talked and socialized to each other. I walked into the giant building, and it was like nothing I had ever seen before. The school was massive, and it was at least 3 time bigger than my old school. I had to find my own way to my first class, and got myself lost several times, but I finally found where it was. I walked into the classroom and the teacher greeted me and I was introduced to the class. I went and found a seat at the very back of the room, where the only seat was available. I noticed as I sat down, the kids started to look at me in a funny way! I wasn't sure what this meant but it made my stomach turn, as if I knew something bad was going to happen. As I walking out of class I got bombarded with tall strong boy’s. They
I had arrived at my destination- a lot sooner than I wanted to. I hurried in the classroom to get the best seat, which was always in the back row by a window. The professor walked in with an energy that I had never encountered before. She carried herself with an air of confidence. She spoke with certainty. She introduced herself and dove right into the first lesson before the first five minutes of class were even over. She informed us that today we would be introducing ourselves to the entire class. I could feel myself becoming nauseous. My hands started shaking and my mind started sorting through a million cliché facts about myself. I could not seem to think of my favorite color at the moment. I am an average, boring, normal eighteen-year-old girl who has a crippling fear of public speaking. That is as far as I got before I heard the professor call my
We pull up to the May Wood County High School, my mom quickly drives off as I get out of the car. I turn to the building, not even two seconds after looking at it, a lady in black comes up to me and grabs my arm. "You need to get in the school before the bell rings young man!" Her voice was eerie in a sense. She dragged me into the building, standing there were tons of other students talking to their friends and socializing. The lady walks back outside to "greet" the other late students. I stand in the middle of the sea of students, not knowing what to do. Everyone was eyeing me and I could definitely hear them talking about me, all of a sudden the bell rang and the flock of kids moved down the hall to their first period. I had to take a quick
I still cry and get scared because the feeling of being anxious is awful. I feel helpless and as if I am being consumed and I have no control of that and I’m not sure I ever will.The thing that has changed about my experience is I accept it now instead of trying to avoid it or dismiss it. I pride myself on my ability to be resilient and my anxiety tests that every day. As I practice resiliency while anxiety I become stronger toward other challenges I may face during my day. Though my anxiety is draining and can be destructive it makes me the strong person that I
The bell rang louder than ever and that meant we had to transition back to homeroom. All of the students huddled into the door frame and pushed and shoved out of the classroom. Me being the smart child just stepped aside and let the stampede pass. When I entered Ms.Erskine’s class, I saw an unfamiliar face sitting next to my other friend Fatim. Fatim and Nevaeh were sitting at the desk chatting away like they were previous best friends. I slowly walked into the classroom confused
I suddenly jolted up and nobody was in the room,it was weird to have nobody in the room in the middle of the class. I checked the clock on the wall and seen it was only 9:00,classes still should be going on. Especially history, they just had to put history first thing on the morning. As I looked around the school for somebody,as the intercom system went on in one room I quickly raced to the room.
The sky was bright and the birds were sitting on the tree branches singing their songs. I layed in bed slowly trying to pull myself out of bed. It would be my first day back to school in 3 days. I reach for my phone to look at the time. 7:15. Schools already started so there is no point in going. The teachers will understand. I set my phone back down on the nightstand. After a few minutes pass by I hear my phone buzz. It’s a text from my friend, Britney.
Starting the day started off by waiting in my seat a 3rd-grade classroom at River View Elementary taught by Mrs. Course. Surrounded by the same people every day waiting in agony to get called out of the classroom. It was thoughtful of the teachers to let me leave almost every day, so I could gain help with reading during the time everyone else was reading with the teacher. Although leaving early every day left me wondering if anyone notices. The teacher walks up to me and says “Shaylee it’s time to go.” After that worry, the other 3rd graders will notice I abandon the classroom seeps into my thoughts. The volcano of questions starts to explode, creating inquiry thoughts of “What if they make fun of me?”, “Where did you
I stepped into Mrs.Swartz’s 2nd grade class and I was frozen because,none of my friends were in her class.Just a ton of strangers.On the outside it may have looked like I was calm,but in the inside I was going all over the place,and I was so scared.There were name tags with cute apples on them,and all I could think was”Oh great,I have to sit next to a boy.”There was this girl in my group that seem a little hyper.Well,maybe more than a little hyper she was like “Hey!What’s your name!” and I whispered in a shy voice”Dinara.”Then I asked her and she said “Bri.”
"Tasnim, can you please stay after class? I need to talk to you." I let go of the door handle and whip my head back to face my third grade teacher Mrs. Russell. She said my name correctly for the first time all year, though her voice was stern. I realize that my jaw has dropped by the expression on her face as she peers over her laptop. As I walk slowly towards her, my classmates whisper, "Ooh she's in trouble" as they sprint out the door for recess. I stand near my teacher's desk waiting for all the students to leave and when the room is silent, Mrs. Russell says,
It was that time of the year ,which was back to school, it was the day ,I got to meet my 8th grade teacher ,I was sweating and had butterflies in my stomach. It was coincidence to find my friend Sheyla at the parking lot. Sheyla said she has met her teacher ,but needed a few more supplies ,so she was just back from getting her last supplies. Sheyla’s family went with us to met my teacher ,and I was glad to see her because it was quite a while since I last saw her. Later, after we left Berkmar grounds,I went to Sheyla’s house and we hangout the rest of the day. It was the first day of school, usually I would be feeling nervous,but today I wasn't ,which was good because I didn't want have sweating hands and a racing heartbeat. I arrived at Berkamr and went straight to homeroom ,I found my seat and waited. My first day at school wasn't to bad because the only thing
I feel sick when I wake up because my nerves are getting the best of me. I get up and pick out my cutest outfit. I'm scared that the people at this school won't like it because who knows what they'll say. As I'm getting ready I daydream about what could happen today at school. My father has already left for work by the time I was ready to go. My mother kissed my cheek as she handed me my lunch telling me little motivational things in my ear. I walk down to my corner to wait for my bus to come. There's a
I was anxious michael would confront me about stealing chips or a pop from the canteen. Soon this anxiousness would turn into reality. Right before Lunch i packed my lunch to go to the main gym were grades one to 8 would each lunch, and also where we would do the milk program.lol Since the milk program was during lunch we would eat our lunches during lunch recess so we could prepare before kids would come to eat their lunches. I sat down to eat my lunch with the other students we talked then got ready for the collection of juice boxes, soon after we were done milk program We went to the canteen to clean out the trays and recycle the recyclables. As Michael reached into the fridge he took a pop,he glanced over at me. It was an odd eye contact but I knew what was going to happen, Michael walked over and told me to hide it as michael whispered “ hide it, trust me we won't get caught” I felt a rush and i hide the pop in my sweater pocket, without concern I walked out of the canteen with an obvious way of walking. I felt the presence of a teacher near, and there was, there looking at whom was mr. somebody asked me to come here. As I thought in my mind Ii knew I was in a load of crap, I walked over there slightly shivering in guilt. I felt the salty taste of saliva dry up in my mouth as I began to speak in a
I am still tired and I feel like it is too early for me to wake up so I go back to sleep. My parents come and wake me up again and urged me to go get ready for school. I took a bath, brushed my teeth, got dressed, grabbed my loaded backpack, my packed lunchbox, and I was all set. My parents walked me to the bus stop and we waited for my bus to come. A few minutes later my bus came. Their last words to me before I got on the bus was, “Go get them tiger (my school’s mascot), I got on, sat down, and looked out the window to see my parents waving goodbye to me. As the bus starts to go, I start to cry and all my mixed emotions came back. Slowly, I decide to suck it up, realizing crying won’t help the situation at all. The bus comes to a stop at our school and I start to feel what I like to call “first-day jitters.” (named after the back-to-school book by Julie Danneberg which is also my favorite picture book.) I get off of the bus and I go in the school and all the other kids find their classroom with ease while I am stuck trying to find where I am supposed to go. I spot a policeman and ask him to guide me to my classroom. He is very kind and he asks to see my schedule, I give him my bookbag and he finds my schedule and starts to walk me to my classroom. On the way to my classroom, I tell the policeman that I am hungry. He then shows me to the cafeteria so that I can eat breakfast, he got a plate for me and waited until I was done eating to show me to my classroom. He then leads me to the kindergarten hallway and we arrive at my destination. I start to think, “I already am friends with Kristian and Benjamin will I make anymore friends?” and “How will they treat me?” I go into my classroom and I am amazed to see lots of kids playing around, doing whatever they want to do. I throw my backpack and lunchbox inside my cubby and I join the
The day right from the start seemed like a good day so I went about smiling and walked blissfully to my normal seat next to my friends. We prepared for the coming classes that day. The deafening bell sounded and we were on our way to start the actual day. My classmates and I walked joyfully through the hallways, joking and laughing before reaching our first period destination. I made my way to the front of the classroom and sat down. The air was crisp so I took out my jacket and put it on. Our teacher walked in a few minutes late and started to take attendance. The whole classroom focused on him. After he finished taking attendance, he slowly reached down into a drawer and pulled out a stack of papers. I stared in disbelief. The stack of papers he pulled out was actually a pop-test. I took the pop-test trying to recall everything that we had learned over the course of two weeks. I focused on the test for most of the class period and finally turned it in. The morning weather seemed to just be a ruse. This was not a blissful or good day; it took a turn for the worst. I sat there in the chilling room trying to think of something else to keep