Conflict is defined as the perception of incompatible goals or actions between two people (McCornack, 2013). How you approach these tense situations greatly affects the outcome of the conflict and your interpersonal relationships. Everyone experiences disagreement at some point in their lives and it is important to know what you bring to conflict situations in order to become a more competent communicator. Therefore, I completed the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Questionnaire and asked my sister and boyfriend to do the same regarding my conflict style (Introduction to Interpersonal Communication Course Workbook, 2013, p.29-31). I chose these two people to fill out the questionnaire because they both know me very well in two different types …show more content…
While interviewing my boyfriend, he pointed out that I always complain to him about issues I have within a variety of relationships including roommates, friends, classmates, family members, etc., but that I never actually confront the person about the conflict. This further proves my inflexibility since I do not change my conflict style according to the degree of conflict or the type of relationship. I still avoid the issue no matter who it is with or what it is about.
A person uses certain tactics in order to carry out their overall approach to conflict (Seung, 2014, March 21). I personally use direct denial, topic shifts, and noncommittal questions most frequently in order to avoid conflict with others. Using direct denial explicitly rejects that there is an issue at hand. For example, my roommate plays loud music in her room when she studies and she asked if it bothered me. I lied and said, “No, it isn’t a problem, I can barely hear it in my room, anyway” although it is loud enough to distract me while I’m studying. Using this tactic allowed my roommate to suffer no loss at all while I am still dealing with the issue. Although the use of this tactic avoided a disagreement in our relationship, it did not solve the conflict in the long run because I still have deal with the issue.
Conflict is inevitable in any personal relationship or among members of any group. While we encounter many types of conflict in our lifetime, we often look for ways to avoid conflict. So, why do we run away from dealing with our conflict? It is often because many of us fear the conflict will escalate into a situation we will not be able to sustain. “As conflicts escalate, they go through certain incremental transformations. Although these transformations occur separately on each side, they affect the conflict as a whole because they are usually mirrored by the other side. As a result of these transformations, the conflict is intensified in ways that are sometimes exceedingly difficult to undo” (Pruitt, and Kim 89). We
How many interpersonal conflicts have you been in today, this week, or even this month? Do you even know which conflict styles you normally use when faced with a disagreement? Furthermore, this analysis shall reflect on my particular conflict styles, with an in-depth look at possible benefits of knowing the conflict styles I tend to incorporate, and how behaviors change based on a relationship and the environment.
In a dispute, it's often easier to describe how others respond then to how we respond. Each of us has a predominant conflict style that we use to meet our own needs. By examining conflict styles and the consequences of those behaviors, we can gain a better understanding of the impact that our personal conflict style has on other people. With a better understanding, you then can make a conscious choice on how to respond to others in a conflict situation to help reduce work conflict and stress.
I interviewed one friend and two family members to know about my conflict styles. I also asked them about my conflict triggers. I started by explaining the four conflict styles to all my interviewees.
Avoiding conflict is a pivotal and detrimental part of my life. For as long as I can remember I have attempted to avoid conflict at all cost. I assume Sigmund Freud would attribute this trait to the lack of a real father figure in my life or possibly the excess amount of condescending, over bearing, and verbally abusive reprimands I received from my step-father. When confronting someone who has wronged you results in a worse outcome than being passive you tend to learn very quickly that it’s easier to live emotionally oppressed than it is to live physically oppressed. It’s been a long time since those days and I am not the young kid I once was but, sometimes I still try to avoid conflict like my life depends on it. The most recent, or even
As individuals, we all have different approaches to deal with conflict. We also all have an order of preference among the styles that influence our communication choices. In this activity, I have taken a self-analysis assessment that identified the preference order I use with my conflicts. I learned that there are five basic orientations for handling conflict and those are avoidance, competition, compromise, accommodation, and collaboration. The assessment today showed me my conflict style preference and the tactics I use for handling conflict. Today, I will write in deeper details about my results of this self-analysis.
If there any concern rises about escalating conflict I always trying to contain it and neutralize while the conflict is in the beginning stage. Interesting how can someone be good at “Managing Conflict” while there is no conflict.
Sometimes when there is disagreement or even fights may happen can be neglected for long periods of time. “I was once in a fight with my best friend, and I didn’t even realize it!” Person A stated that they knew something was wrong but struggled to approach it because if something was wrong wouldn’t they come out and say so directly? Person A in the end always goes back to logic and is struggling to sometimes grasp the emotional needs of others around them. Person A would rather give a suggestion or fix a solution to a problem and doesn’t see much appeal in simply talking about it.
Conflict Management Styles: - Wilmot and Hocker (2001) Conflict Management Styles refer to “patterned responses, or clusters of behavior, that people use in conflict “through diverse communication tactics. According to Thomas (1976) and Folger et al., (1997), Conflict Management Style is a “general and consistent orientation toward the other party and the conflict issues, manifest in observable behaviors that form a pattern and share common characteristics over time” (Kuhn & Poole, 2000). Blake and Mouton (1964) propose a grid for classifying the modes of handling interpersonal conflicts into five types based on two dimensions: concern for people and concern for production. The interaction of these two gives rise to five conflict management styles: withdrawing, forcing, smoothing, compromising, and confrontation. Thomas (1976) redesigned the two dimensional model by adopting new refined dimensions: cooperativeness and assertiveness. He defines assertiveness as 'attempting to satisfy one's own
Conflict is the exchange of ideas or points in a negative aspect. It involves individuals usually getting involved in disagreements. If you find yourself in a conflicted situation with someone else, it is best to divert the emotional change from the situation so that you and the person can solve your differences on a clear headed level in resolving the conflict
Being involved in a close relationship with a significant other can bring many opportunities for people to grow as a couple and individuals, which allows them to learn more about themselves and how to care for another person. Although an intimate relationship can bring happiness and positivity to one’s life, conflict is a normal human interaction, and, as a result, it is inevitable in close relationships. However, depending on how the couple handles arising conflict, it can either have constructive or destructive outcome, either making the relationship stronger and more satisfying or irritating and dissatisfying. There are an abundant ways for conflict in intimate relationships to occur, and can be about nearly anything, ranging from money to who does the dishes (Miller, 2015). In fact, John Gottman, a psychologist known for his work on marital stability and relationship analysis, theorized three different conflict types people can exhibit when conflict emerges in a relationship: avoidance, validating, and volatile (Busby & Holman, 2009). People with avoidant styles try to avoid conflict altogether (Gottman, 1993). Those with validating styles tend to address conflict more calmly and put emphasize on the importance of understanding each other’s points of views (Miller, 2015). In contrast, people with volatile conflict styles have frequent and passionate arguments and are not afraid to disagree with one another (Busby et al., 2009). In an online article featured in the
Conflict has always been tricky to navigate. I say this specifically because I have been non-confrontational for most of my life and was looking at conflict as something to get over as fast as possible, which meant for me to either stay silent or take blame. As I gain experiences throughout life with different types and responses to conflict, I’m beginning to learn my role. As Lederach advises, I’m beginning to see conflict as a window towards a better understanding of not only the world, but also myself. Internalizing conflict seemed much easier to burry difficult emotions or avoid uncomfortable conversations rather than enter those challenging situations and dialogues. My journey with conflict has evolved and as I began my college career
Conflict is one of our most interesting aspects of life. Although it is more ornamental as a spectator, we finally find ourselves engaged in our interpersonal conflict experience. On the other hand, conflicts in interpersonal relationships break down, and began to destroy relationships. As communications becomes invalid, your sentiment takes over and it will destroy your relationship.
Managing conflicts between people is a regular course of business for officers regardless of whether the time is spent on patrol duty or investigations. The management of conflict is so common in fact that even at the earliest stages of law enforcement training there is an emphasis on separation of people, de-escalation, evaluation, interviewing and decision making. Conflicts that have led to some form of assault often result in having to write investigative reports, persons being transported my medical personnel and in some cases criminal charges being filed. Within the aspect of evaluating conflicts and assaults; are we missing critical signs that point to lethal dangers to our victims, fellow officers and even the public at large?
When conflict arises, I tend to avoid and act like the problem doesn't even exist or sometimes I communicate indirectly about the situation. I let go of my rights and let the other person thinks he or she is right, until we are