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A Story : A Short Story

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He soaps himself thoroughly, washes his hair twice, and holds his face under the water a long time, eyes closed, feeling like there was something he meant to feel now.
Did she have a good time? He can’t tell whether the trip is a success or a failure. They came to talk and they didn’t. At the same time, he said almost everything he’d been keeping from her, and she didn’t seem to care.
Maybe she’s right. What’s the point of fighting the same fights over and over again? If discussing something will only drive them further apart, why bring it up?
Well, in the interest of honesty. That’s what he thought. He lost her the last time by not being honest enough. Who knows, maybe if he’d told her about Ester right away, she wouldn’t have left. After all, she stuck around for a few months even after she found out the wrong way.
“I want to believe you,” she said at the time, or maybe “I want to trust you.” He thought those were just empty words, but maybe she really did want to.
What’s different now? For weeks, he’s been doing every- thing right, fixing all the things she used to complain about: taking her out to dinner, taking her for a weekend away, buying her flowers, talking about his feelings, telling her the truth. If it isn’t enough, he doesn’t know what would be.
The idea of having told her originally has planted itself in his head and he can’t get it back out. She would’ve been angry, or worse, played the martyr, but he would’ve groveled and doted on her until she forgave him.

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