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| A GENTLEMAN of vast agility, | |
| Who teaches capers and civility, | |
| And whose whole life consists of play days, | |
| Informs the gentlemen and ladies | |
| Of Bellows Falls, and other places, | 5 |
| That he ’s grand master of the graces— | |
| Professor of the violin, | |
| And hopes to suit them to a pin | |
| In teaching arts, and fascinations, | |
| Dancing and other recreations. | 10 |
| Amphion, Orpheus, or Apollo, | |
| In fiddling he can beat all hollow; | |
| And all those wonder-working elves, | |
| Who made huge houses build themselves, | |
| And rocks responsive to their ditties, | 15 |
| Rise into palaces and cities, | |
| Compared with him, are every one | |
| Like fire-bugs liken’d to the sun. | |
| He steps a hornpipe so genteel, | |
| You ’d think him dealing with the de’il. | 20 |
| Can teach young ladies nineteen millions | |
| Of spick and span new French cotillions, | |
| With flourishes, and turns, and twists, | |
| Of arms and elbows, toes and wrists, | |
| And attitudes of fascination, | 25 |
| Enough to ravish all creation. | |
| He whirls, and bounds, and sinks and rises, | |
| Makes figures of all sorts and sizes, | |
| Flies nine times round the hall, before | |
| He condescends to touch the floor, | 30 |
| And now and then like lightning springs | |
| And borne aloft on pigeons’ wings, | |
| Cuts capers wonderful and rare | |
| Like fairy frolicking in the air. | |
| He waltzes in a style so smart | 35 |
| A lady’s adamantine heart | |
| Will be inevitably melted, | |
| Like ore that ’s in a furnace smelted. | |
| All these and fifty other capers | |
| Not fit to print in public papers, | 40 |
| Which put the genteel polish on, | |
| And fit a tippy for the ton, | |
| Said Signior Squeak will teach his scholars;— | |
| Terms, per quarter, twenty dollars. | |
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| Nota Bene—ladies grown, | 45 |
| Said Signior waits upon alone, | |
| Teaching graces, arts, and airs, | |
| And other delicate affairs; | |
| How to look and act as prettily | |
| As belles of England, France, or Italy. | 50 |
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