Nonfiction > Lionel Strachey, et al., eds. > The World’s Wit and Humor > American
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CONTENTS · VOLUME CONTENTS · INDEX TO AUTHORS · BIBLIOGRAPHIC RECORD
The World’s Wit and Humor: An Encyclopedia in 15 Volumes.  1906.
Vols. I–V: American
 
A Lost Opportunity
College Humor
 
Riant, ’93, in “Wrinkle,” University of Michigan

OH, gay Bacchus, you mad fellow!
  It was always queer to me
How you got o’er being mellow,
  When you went upon a spree.
 
How’d you keep your head from swelling,        5
  When Silenus and his crew
Brought you to your sylvan dwelling,
  Loaded with ambrosial brew?
 
Seltzer then was not invented,
  To reduce the size of heads;        10
When filled with Olympic cocktails
  You were gently put to bed.
 
Did you have a secret potion,
  Brewed in some sequestered glade,
Treasured as a sacred lotion,        15
  Guarded by some sylvan maid?
 
Had you lived in later ages,
  And had brought your secret down,
You’d have quickly made your fortune,
  In ’most any college town.        20
 
 
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