Verse > Anthologies > T. R. Smith, ed. > Poetica Erotica: A Collection of Rare and Curious Amatory Verse
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T. R. Smith, comp.  Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse.  1921–22.
 
My Thing Is My Own
Anonymous
 
(From Pills to Purge Melancholy, 1707)

I, A TENDER young Maid have been courted by many,
Of all sorts and Trades as ever was any:
A spruce Haberdasher first spake me fair,
But I would have nothing to do with Small ware.
  My Thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,        5
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A sweet scented Courtier did give me a Kiss,
And promis’d me Mountains if I would be his,
But I’ll not believe him, for it is too true,
Some Courtiers do promise much more than they do.        10
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A fine Man of Law did come out of the Strand,
To plead his own Cause with his Fee in his Hand;
He made a brave Motion but that would not do,        15
For I did dismiss him, and Nonsuit him too.
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
Next came a young Fellow, a notable Spark,
(With Green Bag and Inkhorn, a Justice’s Clark)        20
He pull’d out his Warrant to make all appear,
But I sent him away with a Flea in his Ear.
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A Master of Music came with an intent,        25
To give me a Lesson on my Instrument,
I thank’d him for nothing, but bid him be gone,
For my little Fiddle should not be played on.
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.        30
 
An Usurer came with abundance of Cash,
But I had no mind to come under his Lash,
He proffered me Jewels, and great store of Gold,
But I would not Mortgage my little Free-hold.
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,        35
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A blunt Lieutenant surprised my Placket,
And fiercely began to rifle and sack it,
I mustered my Spirits up and became bold,
And forced my Lieutenant to quit his strong hold.        40
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A Crafty young Bumpkin that was very rich,
And used with his Bargains to go thro’ stitch,
Did tender a Sum, but it would not avail,        45
That I should admit him my Tenant in tail.
  My Thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A fine dapper Taylor, with a Yard in his Hand,
Did proffer his Service to be at Command,        50
He talked of a slit I had above Knee,
But I’ll have no Tailors to stitch it for me.
  My Thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
A Gentleman that did talk much of his Grounds,        55
His Horses, his Setting-Dogs, and his Grey-hounds,
Put in for a Course, and used all his Art,
But he mist of the Sport, for Puss would not start.
  My Thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.        60
 
A pretty young Squire new come to the Town,
To empty his Pockets, and so to go down,
Did proffer a kindness, but I would have none,
The same that he used to his Mother’s Maid Joan.
  My Thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,        65
  Yet other young Lasses may do what they will.
 
Now here I could reckon a hundred and more,
Besides all the Gamesters recited before,
That made their addresses in hopes of a snap
But as young as I was, I understood Trap.        70
  My thing is my own, and I’ll keep it so still,
  Until I be Married, say Men what they will.
 
 
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